MONSTER
by Something Dysfunctional
Summary: Kurt Hummel knew that he could have what he wanted, especially Finn Hudson. But what will happen during a project for Glee Club that has him wondering if his crush thinks differently of him? Influenced by music and Lady GaGa, Kurt will open up to Finn.
1. Cold Feet

**MONSTER**  
**A GLEE fanfic**  
** By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter One: Cold Feet**  
** Disclaimer: Blah, blah, blah. We all know who owns it, who runs it, and who's in it. The question is, who is in MY fanfiction? Ha... hahahaha. Easy. Finn and Kurt. Why? Well, my fellow Gleeks, there's always a ton of reasons "why". The first? I don't like the idea of Finn and Rachel together. She's a terrific singer, don't get me wrong! But I don't think Finn is her "ideal type". Jesse is, I think. Secondly, Quin+Puck+pregnancy=Not A Chance In Hell. And thirdly- C'MON! Kurt SO needs to be with Finn. There's a chemistry between them and something WILL happen later on in the season. I'm sure of it! -laughs madly- But anyway, let's sit back, relax, and enjoy this delicious little story. Remember, review nicely and happy reading!**  
---

It's hard to be perfection. In fashion and singing, that is. All of my time is dedicated to those very things. I look good not to impress, but to feel like I know I _am_ fierce. I sing to my heart's content because... well...

okay, I'll admit it. I KNOW I can sing. It's for a given fact. Why else would I have dedicated my time watching Babs, Judy, Liza, and Beyonce? To give myself a voice- an outlet. High school is like a vast play-ground for children. You have the usual: jocks, cheerleaders, the in-betweeners that never get made fun of or just don't really get glanced upon, the goths, the nerds, and last, but certainly not least, the dramatic students. That's when I come in; I am a drama student. I'm part of a rag-tag team of the Glee Club at McKinley High known as New Directions that is run by our Spanish teacher, William Schuester. Apparently, he had his glory days of being in the Glee Club back in the day and wanted to give others a chance at full-filling a dream of those wanting a voice.

Luckily, I already had mine.

As the morning was winding down, I straightened out the collar of my Calvin Klein button down and brushed back a lock of my hair back into its place as I paraded down the high school hallways. We were on our way to Regionals for the Glee Club and it was starting to show a little bit on the fellow members. But not me. There is no excuse to _not_ look your best for ANYTHING. I mean a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g. Especially if it falls under the category of said one Finn Hudson: star quarterback of the football team, tall and dreamy, and a complete idiot at times. He's too adorable, naive, and overly sweet. Sort of like a puppy.

And I was madly in love with him.  
_...what?_

I had been forever. And since the incident with his ex-girlfriend, Quinn Fabray, being pregnant by his best friend, Noah "Puck" Puckerman, and the constant stalking/disgusting/horrible display of flirting by Rachel Berry, Finn was completely lost and tended to wander around by himself. Enter one excellent and fashionable Kurt Hummel, diva and Finn's shoulder to cry on. Of course, you may think it's because I am doing it for his affection. Well, duh. For someone to get what they want, they will do any means necessary for their goal. Mine was just getting Finn to notice me and depend on me more. I want him to go, "Rachel Who?" and go on about me. Conceited, I know.

That's how I am.

I twirled the knob on my locker before History class, opening the door and preening at the mirror that was on the side littered with cut-outs of my favorite icons and crushes- celebrity, mind you. You think I would actually have a photo of Finn hanging up? It's secretly stashed in one of my folders. Making sure each strand of hair was perfectly in place and that I was looking fresh and clean, I grabbed my History book, placed a hand-kiss on Lady GaGa's face and turned to walk away.

Only to meet face-to-face with a sturdy chest that injured my cute nose. "What the hell?," I exclaimed, clamping a hand over it. "Sorry, Kurt. I didn't mean to scare you like that... you okay?," came the concerned and sheepish voice of my inner desires. Looking up, I melted once I say Finn's chocolate eyes. "Of course... but why did you sneak up on me like that? Something the matter? Could it be that you finally realized you need more patterns in your wardrobe than plaid?," I fluttered on, gesturing a hand at his shirt. He glanced down, his brow furrowing in curiosity. "Is it that? Wait, no, no, that's not what I mean. I just wanted to see if I could borrow your Spanish notes before Shcuester's test? I wasn't paying attention last time," he rambled on, embarrassed. I smiled genuinely and turned back to my locker. "Certainly. Just make sure you give them back to me in between classes," I said in a soft tone, my neck tingling as Finn stared me.

I took out the two-paged notes and handed them to him, our fingertips barely brushing each other. Electricity raced through me like a pull of fire. No, seriously, it did. Think of all that "Twilight" nonsense for a moment-

EXACTLY like that.

I drew back my hand so calmly and professionally, I think I surprised myself. "Have fun with those," I said carelessly and walked off, tightening my hold on my book bag strap with each step I took. My fingers were burning, scaring me almost as I cradled my hand then to my chest, eyes on the floor. _'You're acting like a schoolgirl in a playground. Is this how you behave? Honestly...,'_ my mind rambled. I shook my head and walked into History class, hoping that Finn didn't feel what I had. He probably is still standing there, looking so dumbfounded and confused.

What a little puppy.  
--

"Boy, there is seriously something wrong with you today. You're not... prissy enough," Mercedes Jones stated at lunch, looking at me with her searing caramel-colored eyes. I sighed and looked at her. "There's plenty of pissy in me, Mercedes. I'm just not feeling it today. Hmm, I wonder if I need some shopping therapy later on," I mused to myself, thinking of the sales racks at the tiny mall and my excellent tastes throwing certain articles of clothing together. "That could be it, but mind if I bust your bubble for a moment? Our boy, Finn, has been looking over here for over seven minutes. That interest you enough?," Mercedes smirked into her pasta salad. I perked up at this and oh-so-coolly, glanced over my shoulder to see that my best friend was right. Finn was sitting with the other jocks and Puck, his eyes boring into my own.

It was kind of... scary. Not in a Stephen King way, but like "how do I figure you out" look. I felt my heart leap and turning my head away, I leaned down towards Mercedes. "I don't know why he is. I haven't done anything out of the ordinary," I said casually. Mercedes throw me a look and made a noise in her mouth, not believing me. "Back track: you said he needed to borrow your notes earlier. Anything happen then?," she asked. I didn't _really_ want to tell her about the spark I felt when I briefly touched his fingers... that was private! "Nothing happened," I repeated, picking at my salad, eyes cast down.

I didn't want her to know.  
--

Glee was then soon upon me, and I bounced into the room with Tina Cohen-Chang, arm and arm with her as we sailed to stop in front of Artie Abrams, striking up conversation before the rest of the club filed in. I stood with my hip jutted out, arms crossed over my chest, flicking my hair ever so often as I saw a familiar build out of the corner of my vision. My Finn was here at last. I continued the talk til Mercedes joined in. I stood straighter and allowed myself to laugh out loud, only so quietly and filled with a husky flair. I've been practicing to not sound so girly. And the same feeling from his previous staring raced up and down my spine and I relished under the scrutiny.

"Okay, class, settle on down," came the voice of Mr. Schue. I walked to my seat beside Mercedes and for some odd reason, Quinn took my other side, her doe-brown eyes flickering to me and a small smile grace her too-pale skin. Shocked, I gave her a uneasy smile back and turned my attention to Mr. Schue. "So, the Regionals are on us soon, and so, for a little fun, I thought we'd work on some older pieces to reach back to our roots of musicals," he said with a air of excitement, rubbing his hands together as he grinned. I sat up and leaned forward, matching his aura. I _loved_ musicals more than polishing my Barbie tiara. Several groans filled the air from Puck, Matt, Mike, and Finn. Typical. "Which ones were you thinking about?," I asked.

"Oh, you know... the old school ones... "RENT", "Fiddler On The Roof", "Oklahoma!" and a special one for you, Kurt. I picked it out myself," Mr. Schue said off-handled, handing me a thick pack of sheet music. I glanced at the title and allowed a shaky breath to gasp out. "You're giving me... Phantom?," I asked, my voice quivering.

"Of course! It suited you when I was looking them up yesterday. It practically screams your name, Kurt," Mr. Schue smiled warmly. Rachel's hand immediately went up. "I do believe that showing favoritism, Mr. Schue. I personally do not see a special reason why Kurt gets to have "Phantom of the Opera" and not someone else," she sniffed, obviously pouting while her boyfriend, Jesse St. James , wrapped a arm around her shoulders sympathetically. Beside me, Quinn sighed and mumbled, "Jealous idiot", under her breath. I chose that moment to stifle a giggle and playfully punch her in the arm. She warmed under the affection and leaned against me, smiling wholly.

"I wasn't showing favorites, Rachel. I chose it because I know Kurt can hit those high notes. I'm giving him a chance to show us how a make soprano can "really" sing," our teacher explained. "So, you're saying you're giving us songs that show us our strengths?," Artie asked, folding his hands together in his lap. "Precisely! I want each of you, to bring out what's within you in one song you think depicts yourself," he said, passing out the rest of the music to the members. I sat still, clutching Phantom to my chest, the warm lean of Quinn's body and started to day-dream of myself on stage, singing...  
--

It was empty. One lone spotlight shone on me, the color of fluorescent moonbeams. I raised my head up, closing my eyes:

_"Think of me,_  
_think of me fondly when we've said goodbye._  
_Think of me,_  
_once in a while, please promise me you'll try._  
_When you find,_  
_that once again you long to take your heart back and be free,_  
_if you ever find a moment,_  
_stop and think of me..."_

And then I stopped, unsure of myself.  
What was I singing for? And for who?

I stopped altogether and walked off the stage, my feelings and heart left behind me.  
--

I drew myself out of my mind when I heard Mercedes call out my name. "Yes?," I murmured, my nerves suddenly shot. "Mr. Schue wants us to practice on some songs. Be my partner?" I started to nod, when my stomach violently churned. "Uhm... give me a moment. I need to go to the bathroom," I said swiftly, lowly. I raced out of the classroom and down the hallway, the smell of cleaner supplies, body cologne and perfume, lunch, and other unpleasantness filling my nostrils. I made it in the girl's restroom in time to a stall and throw up everything in my stomach. I gasped, holding the ceramic bowl for life as I heaved and silently cried.

What was wrong with me? Calm, cool, collected Kurt Hummel had blown everything. Embarrassed and humiliated, I slumped to the floor and leaned back against the stall wall, hiccuping quietly.

"Kurt... you okay?," came a gentle voice from the door. I glanced down at the floor and saw cute, white ballet slippers with silver lining them. "Quinn?," I asked hoarsely. The door pushed opened, revealing the blonde former Cheerio. We silently regarded each other until she joined me, sitting back on her haunches, the pink baby-doll blouse showing off the rounded belly that was growing in her teenager body. "I knew something was wrong with you," she murmured, her face concerned. "How did you know?," I snapped irritatedly, not really meaning to. "I felt it," she answered, blinking slowly, her long eyelashes falling on her cheeks. "When Mr. Schuester handed you that sheet packet, your whole attitude changed. Then, you got really still... and you clenched up. Your whole posture changed. That's how I could tell. What were you thinking?," she asked, taking my hand. I swallowed, not wanting her to know my deep secret.

"Finn?"

Well... damn.

Quinn smiled so sweetly and then giggled. "Come on. Let's go back to class," she offered.  
--

That night, at home, I sat on my bed, huddled in my large blanket of white fleece, listening to Madonna croon on my CD player. My heart was a clutter of feelings: the sudden friendship of the pregnant blonde ex-cheerleader, Finn's questionable stare, and my own battling urge to call Finn and see what he meant from today in the cafeteria. Sighing, I ran my hand over my face and stifled the impulse to cry. I knew what I wanted. I stood, padding over to my tall dresser. I knelt and opened the last drawer, the smell of a mother washing over me. I held one of Mom's blouses to my nose and inhaled deeply, wrapping my soul around that piece of fabric. "Mom... what do I need to do?," I asked timidly. I knew there was no "real" answer, but I could imagine it. Something along the lines of, "Follow what's in your heart." But, Mom, diva's can't show off their heart- it has to be covered in ice and never revealed the inner most wishes and desires. We can only flaunt how amazing we are in looks and character, never showing how we really felt.

The more I inhaled the stale but poignant scent of my mother, my mind floated to a particular song from Cabaret...

_'Why should I wake up?_  
_This dream is going so well._  
_When you're enchanted,_  
_Why break the spell?_  
_Drifting in this youthful state,_  
_Morning can wait,_  
_Let it come late._  
_Why should I wake up?_  
_Why waste a drop of the wine?_  
_Don't I adore you And aren't you mine?_  
_Maybe I'll someday be lonely again,_  
_But why should I wake up?_  
_Why should I wake up till then?'_

And when morning came, I found myself wrapped around my mother's blouse, on my bed, and with the faint taste of stale tears in my mouth.

I had woken up, but still dreaming of Finn.  
--

I hid behind my locker door until I felt a presence hanging over me. I closed my eyes briefly and inhaled a silent intake of air. "Yes?," I asked mildly. "Here are your notes. I never got a chance to give them back to you," came the sullen reply. I turned, not looking into Finn's face as I accepted them back gratefully, if only a little bit more sadden. "Hey, uhm, about yesterday... you seemed sick during Glee when you came back with Quinn. Are you okay today?," he asked, trying to start a light conversation. Grimacing, I looked up and answered rather dully, "I'm better than what I was yesterday. For a odd reason, I had developed a sense of stage fright-"

"Wait... you? Scared of being onstage?," Finn asked incredulously, blinking rapidly. "Sometimes it happens to the best of us," I grounded out, turning around. "Was it because of the Phantom songs Mr. Schue gave you? I know I'd be kinda freaked out. "Phantom" was a good show and movie, but it's a lot of pressure," he blew out, stuffing his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "Are you implying that I can't handle it? That Rachel Berry should have my glory?," I sneered, now feeling ugly. Finn blanched and I slammed my locker door with the grace of Joan Crawford and pushed away from him. "Remember who you're talking to, Finn Hudson. If someone tries to take something from me, I latch on and won't let go," I reminded him in a icy tone, glaring at him.

"I-I didn't mean to piss you off...," he trailed off, his face flushing a light pink. "Of course you don't mean to. You never _mean_ to, Finn," I sighed, rubbing my face with a free hand.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Suddenly, I felt a large hand over my forehead, as if checking for a temperature. I stood there in shock as I let the love of my life touch me, his touch making my blood boil. My heart seized up in my chest and I held my breath, daring to believe any of this. "You seem hot. Maybe you need to go home? We can't let you get sick," he murmured thoughtfully, his eyes narrowed some in concentration.

"We?," I managed to croak out.

"The Glee Club. And me. We need you in there," he smiled, brightly and stupidly. The lovable dummy. I inwardly groaned at his innocent charms and leaned into his hand, trying not to give up. "Maybe...," I mumbled, my cheeks hot and hands shaking some.

"And I don't think Rachel needs your glory. You do find without her," he implied, smoothing back my hair and stepping away. "I know I do," I whispered and closed my eyes, the electricity still swimming in my body. The bell rung for the next period and I was upset that my small time was cut from Finn. I turned around, ignoring his stare. "Hey, Kurt?"

"Yes?"

"... also, about yesterday, when you touched my hand..."

Damn! I thought he forgot all about that!

I kept my back to him and straightened it, ready to take the bullet. "What about yesterday?," I hinted at.

"You shocked me. It kinda stayed during the day with me. Weird, isn't it? Did it happen to you?," he asked, his voice unreadable. I shrugged nonchalantly. "I guess. I will see you later, Finn."

I left him again in the emptying hallway.  
What a puppy.  
--

**Odd chapter, huh?**  
**Trust me; it'll get better. :)**  
**I hope everyone is in character SO far for ya'll.**  
**---the moonlight carries the message of Love.---**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**"Think of Me" - Phantom of the Opera **  
**"Why Should I Wake Up?" - Cabaret**


	2. Distraction

**MONSTER**  
** A GLEE fanfic**  
** By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Two: Distraction **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you. So, as we know, the Tuesday episode of "GLEE" this week is totally... Theatrical. Haha... I'm funny. And GaGa. FUCKING LADY GAGA, THANK YOU GOD! I'm putting a song in this chapter that I hope you all will love. Of course you will. Because Kurt will be singing it. -laughs- So, we are all liking this so far? Great! I want this to be THE best Kurt/Finn work out there. And I am freaking determined to do so. Let's Get Physical!**  
---

I can't really say what came over me the rest of the day. Tina and Mercedes were unsure how to approach me. I was slightly confused and then took out my compact to see why- I looked like the undead. A cute undead zombie, but nonetheless. I was not at my fiercest. Sighing for the umpteenth time within an hour, I tried to look presentable in Spanish when I saw Finn walk in with Puck, their voices low as they walked past my desk. I ignored the two football players and fiddled with the lapels on my blazer vest. There was no reason to speak to Finn if I wanted to keep my breakfast down and to _not_ think of Phantom.

Why did I freak out so much?

Simple: Finn was right. I was having stage-fright, but over the fact that the song I wanted to sing fitted him and myself to a "T", even if he didn't share my feelings. The idea of singing it for Mr. Schue made my head swim...

I covered my eyes with my hand tried to even out my breathing as the said teacher walked in, blabbering in Spanish to the class, who in reply mumbled something back that wasn't quite understandable.

It was then when I felt something hit the back of my head. Raising an eyebrow, I turned around to see a wadded up piece of paper on the floor. I glanced at Puck and Finn, who were obviously scribbling something Mr. Schue said. I scanned the rest of the class, noticing that they were all writing. I blinked owlishly and grabbed the paper swiftly, hiding it underneath the surface of my desk. I unfolded it as quietly as I could and looked down at the black ink that scrawled the crumpled sheet.

_**'You left me yesterday.'**_

I swallowed the sudden lump in my throat, blood rushing in my ears. Finn... I wrote back a hasty reply of, _'I had to get to class_', and flung it back when Mr. Schuester's back was to his class. The next thing I knew, a small conversation happed by throwing trash back and forth to each other-

**_'So what if you had class? I was really worried about you.'_**

_'Sure, Finn. It's okay though. I'm fine today. Peachy keen and fabulous. Happy now?'_

_**'No. Not really. Is there anything you wanna talk about after school? I'll buy you a vegan ice-cream sundae.'**_

Oh, dammit. He knew I was a sucker for organic desserts. I blew out a irritated puff of air that ruffled my bangs and I wrote back as the bell rang. Eyes still down, I turned and aimed for Finn's forehead. It hit it perfectly. Smiling brightly at him, I walked away out of the room to meet up with Mercedes near my locker.

_'You can buy me that sundae. You have an hour to talk with me.'_  
--

Quinn raised an eyebrow at me as I shoveled in a forkful of my homemade broccoli and cauliflower salad with raspberry vinaigrette dressing into my mouth. "You're going to talk to him? Hmm... are you sure you're ready for that?," she asked politely, rubbing her small, bulging belly. I nodded some, looking back at her. "You won't be mad about that, will you?," I pressed. "No, I won't. If you know that you need to do this, go ahead, Kurt. I'm not with him anymore, but beware of the Rachel Berry-zilla. She starts shooting fire, we're all screwed," she grinned, winking at me. I laughed at her sudden humor then grew solemn, focusing my gaze on the blonde. "Why are you being so nice to me all of a sudden?," I finally questioned. Quinn's doe-brown eyes fell to her tray, her hands clasping over the surface of her stomach. "Hormones, maybe? But yesterday... I just had the urge to sit beside you. I know I was never really nice to you, but now, I want to be a good friend to you. I promise- no strings attached. No Cheerio threats," she swore, raising her hand like a Girl Scout.

"So you don't mind my crush on Finn?"

"I've always known you had a thing for him. I didn't make it into a big deal then because he had me. But now, with Puck being the father and all, I don't see a reason to not let you go after your own happiness," Quinn said softly, tears swimming in her dark eyes. I leaned over and took her tiny hand and squeezed it, some of my iciness melting. "Glee Club is my happiness. And having all of you all in my life is good. But Finn... I can't describe it, honestly," I shrugged.

"I don't think I've ever seen you like this," Quinn mused, a small smile gracing her face. "And you won't. I have a bitchy image to uphold," I sniffed, brushing back some of my hair. She giggled as Mercedes and Tina approached the table, their looks unrecognizable and confused. "Uh, Quinn? Do you have the wrong table?," Tina asked politely, but with an edge of steel. Quinn drew in her bottom lip, her eyes flickering to me. "I asked her to sit here," I said, pulling back two chairs for the girls. They sat down rather stiffly but then warmed up to the blonde.

Before lunch was over, I felt a stare bearing into my neck. I turned some, knowing fully well that Finn Hudson was giving me his look again. I sneered and stuck out my tongue, a bit immature on my part, but it made me feel good. Finn started and then grinned my favorite loop-sided smile and I instantly became butter. Heart fluttering, I shook my head and him and smiled, looking away.

And then I was met with three pairs of wide and eager eyes.

"You were flirting with him!," Mercedes hissed, slapping her hands eagerly on the table-top. "Was not!," I shrieked, ducking my head down. Tina laughed loudly and then looked over my head. "Oh, really? Why is he still staring at you?," she asked in a sing-song voice. Flustered, I raised my head fast. "No he isn't!," I moaned, embarrassed. The three girls fell over each other, laughing gaily and wiping tears from their eyes.

"It's not THAT funny," I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest. "Oh, it is, white boy," Mercedes stated, smoothing back her curly hair, eyes twinkling. "And Finn has "never" looked so confused in his life," Quinn smirked.  
--

"I believe, that we need a pick-me-up!," Mr. Schue announced during Glee rehearsals. "What kind?," Puck asked, frowning. Leave it to Mr. Grumpy to scowl at anything _fun_. Mr. Schue grinned and pointed to the band, who began to play at a steady, continuous tempo, his voice melding :

_"Loving you isn't the right thing to do _  
_How can I ever change things that I feel?_  
_If I could, maybe I'd give you my world _  
_How can I, when you won't take it from me?"_

Finn perked up at the tune and with a boyish grin, he jumped up from his seat and went down with our teacher, busting out his powerful range.

_"You can go your own way, _  
_go your own way_  
_ You can call it another lonely day _  
_You can go your own way, go your own way!"_

Everyone started clapping in beat, smiles plastered on their faces at the familiarity of Fleetwood Mac. Tina stood, head tilted back as she started the next bridge, no fear etched on her face.

_"Tell me why everything turned around?_  
_Packing up, shacking up, is all you wanna do?"_

Artie joined her with Mike and Matt, their harmonizing very bright and loud.

_"If I could baby I'd give you my world  
Open up, everything's waiting for you."_

Soon, everyone was jumping around, even conservation Rachel, throwing their arms up and dancing to the music and song, the joyous freedom of the once mighty 70's pulsing throughout the room. I, however, stayed sitting down, eyes down on the floor. Could I go my own way? If it involved Finn and the horrible feeling of never being accepted by him?

_"You can go your own way, go your own way _  
_You can call it another lonely day _  
_You can go your own way, go your own way_

_You can go your own way, go your own way _  
_You can call it another lonely day (Another lonely day)_  
_You can go your own way, go your own way _  
_You can call it another lonely day...!"_

Once everyone was done, they laughed with winded breaths, clapping each other on the backs and high-fiving. I sat on my chair, not looking at them. Mr. Schue saw this and frowned some, his forehead wrinkling in thought. "Kurt? Care to explain?," he asked, his voice piercing my thoughts. I looked at him, my face feeling frozen.

"No."

"It was a awesome song to get loose to! What's up with you?," Santana exclaimed, popping her black ponytail back, her Latina attitude showing. I rolled my eyes and sighed very dramatically. "It's not my thing. Good for you all though to see what is good music from the 70's besides disco, which, I would have preferred," I said with a tone of ice, wrapped around my bitchiness. "Now, Kurt, we have to try out different kinds of music...," Mr. Schue began to explain, and I held up a hand. "May I show you what I mean?," I implied. He nodded and I walked down to the piano, talking lowly to the pianist. Everyone shuffled back to their seats, faces eager and Rachel's dark like thunder, unhappy that the attention was now on me.

I turned back to the class, glancing quickly at Mercedes and Quinn, who smiled encouragingly. Then, my gaze floated to Finn, who looked on intensely, his dark eyes unfathomable. Gulping, I inhaled a lungful of air and began my song:

_"I have a dream _  
_A song to sing _  
_To help me cope With anything _  
_If you see the wonder _  
_Of a fairy tale _  
_You can take the future _  
_Even if you fail I believe in angels _  
_Something good in everything I see _  
_I believe in angels _  
_When I know the time is right for me_  
_ I'll cross the stream_  
_ I have a dream...," _I ended somewhat softly and then allowed my eyes to flare dangerously, bringing out my inner Diva as the band then struck up behind me. I noticed quickly how Finn straightened up in his seat, all of his attention now upon me, undividedly.

_"Stop callin'_  
_Stop callin'_  
_I don't wanna think anymore _  
_I left my head and my heart on the dance floor._  
_Stop callin'_  
_Stop callin'_  
_I don't wanna talk anymore _  
_I left my head and my heart on the dance floor!_

_Not that I don't like you,_  
_I'm just at a party _  
_And I'm sick and tired of my phone r-ringing._  
_Sometimes I feel like I live in Grand Centeral Station _  
_Tonight I'm not takin' no calls _  
_Cause I'll be dancing!"_

Oh...

and DANCE did I did. Brittnay and Santana, secret partners in crime, had halfway through my little number had come down to dance beside me from the music video of "Telephone" and Finn's jaw dropped, either in shock or horror. I couldn't tell, but I felt alive. Grinning like a sly cat, I turned and leaned against Santana while Brittnay draped her form over me.

_"I have a dream _  
_That I left my heart on the dance floor._  
_You can take the future _  
_Even if you fail _  
_I don't wanna talk anymore._  
_You're not going to reach my telephone!"_

With that florish, I marched back to my seat, sat prettily, and raised a brow to Mr. Schue, who was shaking his head, chuckling.

"Is there anything you can't do, Kurt?"

"I can do everything, with the exception of yard work. Messes up my hands," I said in a frost voice, oh-so-cool and suave.

And it seemed that Finn couldn't concentrate at all the rest of class, not even on silly Rachel Berry and Jesse's solo act from some movie. I wasn't listening really. I was glowing inside of how my quarterback crush was thinking too much on my performance.

Again-  
I know I'm good.  
--

And yet when we sat across from each other at the local ice cream shop in town, I felt awkward and nervous, my hands sweating slightly. Finn kept staring holes into his chocolate sundae, spoon methodically going from his bowl to his mouth, up and down. I cleared my throat, hoping to start a good talk. "So... uhm... about today in Spanish. What did you want to discuss?," I asked lightly, twirling my spoon in the melting slush of my vegan pecan ice cream. Finn made a noise and lifted his eyes, his lashes slightly quivering over his dark, earthy eyes. "About yesterday. You never did answer me."

"I found no reason to. Nothing happened."

"Well... to me... something did. I felt funny. And not like, an "ha-ha, wow, that was awesome funny", but like "this is TOO weird funny". Are you sure you didn't feel... _anything_?," he stressed, obviously stressing.

I closed my eyes briefly and inhaled sharply through my nose, ignoring the protesting cries that my heart sang and my hormones for the delicious, handsome boy in front of me.

"No."

"Oh..."

I dug out a spoonful of my dessert and pressed it into my non-willing mouth, trying to distract myself. I must have gone deep into my mind when I felt it again. The electricity. I gasped lightly when I felt Finn's thumb on the corner of my mouth. Eyes wide, I stared at him like a deer in the headlight. "Finn, what are you doing?," I whispered hoarsely, loosing all composure.

"You had some ice cream on your mouth. I was... getting it for you?," he asked, more himself than anything. He held his thumb on my skin, the shock of the slightly rough digit on me making my lower abdomen throb as well as my nerves.

"Th-thank you," I said, stuttering. God, I sounded like Tina.

"Right then... did something happen?," he questioned, eyes unrecognizable. His whole demeanor was rigid, so intense and steady.

So I asked the question that would soon unravel everything I worked so hard to keep tight:

"If it did, what would you do?"

And if it was possible, I watched Finn Hudson's eyes grow darker.  
--

**WOOT!**  
**Chapter for you all.**

**That means reviews for me and inputs, yes?****  
---the moonlight carries the message of Love.---**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**"Telephone"- Lady GaGa **  
**"I Have A Dream" - ABBA from "Mamma Mia!"**  
**"You Can Go Your Own Way"- Fleetwood Mac**


	3. Inhale

**MONSTER **  
**A GLEE fanfic **  
**By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Three: Inhale **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**WOOT! Another chapter! I'm trying to gear up for tomorrow night's episode of "GLEE". I love my Mama Monster, Ze GaGa. -grins- Now, we've got some interesting development going on between Kurt and Finn. Not to mention the sudden friendship of Kurt and Quinn! Is there a motive that the former head Cheerio has, or is she being sincere? Only I know. Pwahahaha! I'm glad that Harry Fado liked the mash-up of "I Have A Dream" and "Telephone"! I'm trying to dig up all of my music that I've listened to ever since I was six and it's a A LOT of variety, thanks to my Mom. And I'm going to dedicate that part to her, even though she knows NOTHING of me writing fanfiction and such. But I wanted you guys to know. -smiles-**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
-

You know that feeling when there's a total stand-still in your mind's eye? That everything has slowed down in a movie where the two main characters have a moment together? I was experiencing that with my lovely Finn.

I can't say for sure how long we stared into each others eyes and (what it felt like to me) my soul.

So, being the brave one, I drew back ever so slightly and let out the shaky breath I was holding so desperately. "Thank you," I murmured softly, letting my gaze fall back to my now melted ice cream, my face hot. "Not a problem," he replied in a mumble, drawing his large hand back and hiding it underneath the table. We didn't say anything for a long time until the waitress stopped by with our check. "I'm glad you're doing better. You know that I'm here for you, right? Like you were with me and the whole Quinn and Puck mess, right?," Finn stated, picking up the slip of paper casually.

I nodded at him and picked up my Marc Jacobs bag, slipping the strap over my shoulder. "And I thank you for the offer, Finn Hudson. Now... if you don't mind, I need to go home and do my homework," I said offhandedly and stood up. Like a flash, he mimicked me, startling me so. I gave him a weak smile and turned away, saying, "Thank you for the treat."

I know I'm rather bitchy, but I still have manners.

"Not a problem," Finn replied, scratching his head, his face etched with his familiar confusion. We walked out, me to my beautiful car and him to his truck. The sun was setting low in the sky, casting beautiful shades of gold, pale blue, and pink. I stared at it some, my keys in my hand as I drunk in the scenery of vast, open sky.

"Whoa..."

I turned to Finn slowly, the wind picking up my hair some. "What?," I asked, cocking an eyebrow up. He was staring at me again, mouth opened slightly. "Uhm... it was your eyes... they looked like, I don't know, the color of the ocean. Wow. That was, huh, corny, right?," he asked, embarrassed at either himself or the statement.

"My eyes?"

"You know how there's really blue? When you were looking at the sun, they changed color. Like the ocean," Finn said, ducking his head down some, rubbing the back of his neck. I smirked, not nastily, but in sadness. "That was sweet of you to say. No one's every complimented my eyes, only my wardrobe and voice."

Finn grinned somewhat. "That's also another good point-"

My cell phone then decided to go off at the moment, "Defying Gravity" (of course) blaring. It was my dad. I opened my phone and pressed it to my ear. "Yes?"

"Hurry on home, Kurt. I got to get finished for my date with Carole!"

I groaned inwardly and slapped my hand over my eyes. "I forgot about that... sure, Dad," I said tiredly and ended the call. "Your mom and my dad have a date tonight. I have to go now," I told Finn, opening my car door. Finn's face fell some and he nodded back to me. "O-okay. See you tomorrow?"

"Of course."  
-

I had completely, almost, forgotten the ONE obstacle in my way that I created: Finn's mother dating my father. It was too ill-wished that I should still love someone while trying to hook our parents up together in order to get close to him. Same song played over and over, a sad romantic wish. I slumped over in my desk chair, head in my arms as my Ipod kept playing Jewel's "Foolish Games" on repeat while I sung along with it quietly.

_"You're always the mysterious one with_  
_ Dark eyes and careless hair,_  
_You were fashionably sensitive_  
_ But too cool to care._  
_You stood in my doorway, with nothing to say _  
_Besides some comment on the weather._

_Well in case you failed to notice,_  
_In case you failed to see,_  
_This is my heart bleeding before you,_  
_This is me down on my knees, and..._

_These foolish games are tearing me apart,_  
_And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart._  
_You're breaking my heart..."_

Oh poor, wounded me.

I groaned and leaned back, huffing. Why do I feel like I running around in a endless circle with this boy? I know I must have put him in a uncomfortable situation. My eyes roamed to the thick sheet music Mr. Schue gave me. Inspired, I jumped from my chair and started setting things up in my room. Within fifteen minutes, my room was dimmed, candles lit, and I stood near my Ipod, scrolling through my Broadway tunes and selected one of my Phantom song, eager. Practice makes perfect, and now, I was determined to get Finn Hudson and stun everyone when our lesson was due at the end of the week. Even snooty Rachel Berry. I wasn't going to flop on another song I loved dearly to my heart for her, not even Dad. Selfish, I know, but it was Kurt's time. So, I decided to practice singing with my "Phantom".

The song started and I began my song, glad that no one was home:

_"In sleep he sang to me,_  
_in dreams he came._  
_That voice which calls to me,_  
_and speaks my name._  
_And do I dream again?_  
_For now I find,_  
_the Phantom of opera is there,_  
_inside my mind."_

The smoky, accented voice of Gerard Butler soon filled the speakers. He was not my Phantom. Finn was. I imagined him singing this with me, goosebumps running across my flesh.

_"Sing once again with me,_  
_our strange duet._  
_My power over you,_  
_grows stronger yet._  
_And though you turn from me,_  
_to glance behind._  
_the Phantom of the opera is there _  
_Inside your mind."_

My heart racing with my wild imagination, I allowed my voice to climb louder and louder-

_"Those who have seen your face draw back in fear._  
_I am the mask you wear-_

_It's me they hear..."_

This was it. The crescendo. Me and Finn together as one voice.

_"(My)Your spirit and my(your)voice in one combined,_  
_the Phantom of the opera is there._  
_Inside (your)my mind..._

_He's there,_  
_the Phantom of the opera."_

Closing my eyes tightly, I allowed the long, high note Christine sung echo around my basement bedroom, ringing with such vibrant tones that I even surprised myself- only a little bit. Dragging in lungfuls of air, I grinned largely in the dark until...

ONLY until I heard a dry cough come from the stairs. Whirling around, I gasped in fear as I saw the one and only Finn looked bewildered at me, a bemused grin on his cute face. "F-Finn! What are you DOING here?," I screeched, totally unlike me. I ran for my Ipod and turned it off, flustered. "Uhm... the door was unlocked and... your dad said I could come over if I wanted to. Like, to keep you company," he said sheepishly, walking down to my room. _'Great, Dad. RUIN my fantasy, please?,'_ I whined in my head as I hurried around my room, blowing out the candles. "You couldn't have come at the worst time!," I hissed, angry. "During you practicing? Kurt, c'mon. We watch each other sing all the time in Glee Club," he said, slightly hurt. "That's besides the point, Finn! Ugh, I look horrible and my room is... not very unbecoming of me," I grumbled, turning on the lights. Finn was now at my desk, looking through my sheet music. "Phantom, huh? I liked the movie a lot. That Phantom had a awesome voice," he offered as a poliet conversation.

"Gerard Butler. Though Michael Crawford had a excellent voice during the play with Sarah Brightman as Christine," I rambled some, inwardly pleased with my knowledgeable information on my favorite play. "Oh really? I never saw it. Is it on YouTube?," Finn asked, his face serious. I stifled a giggle and shook my head, tugging the sleeves of my sweater. "You're lucky if you can find clips of behind the scenes when it _used_ to run on Broadway and The West End. Well, since you're here... are you hungry?," I offered.

"Sure! I'm always hungry anyway," he said, eyes twinkling. "Our star quarterback needs his intake, I daresay. Come on," I motioned with my hands up where the kitchen laid.  
-

Two hours later and a over-stuffed Finn lounging on the couch, we watched some episodes of Family Guy and Project Runway, arguing over the finer points of each program. We were at such ease with each other, that this afternoon's awkward situation was gone from our minds. I began to nod off, a comfortable silence lulling over us like a warm blanket. "Kurt? You asleep?," Finn whispered. "Nu-uh...," I said thickly, voice laced with sleep. A deep chuckle and soon, I felt my body being scooped up in strong arms.

_'Oh...'_

This was nice.

I leaned my head on his burly shoulder, inhaling his smell. Finn smelled like a boy, sports, Axe deodorant, and the scent of my home lingering on him. I snuggled into his arms until I was deposited on my bed and my blanket pulled over my form. I blearily opened my eyes, searching for Finn. I raised my hand and felt his own grasp it. "Stay til I fall asleep?," I asked in a small voice. Finn stared and then nodded, kneeling beside my bed. I must have smiled or did something, for a look crossed his face like that of a mother looking at her child, so lovingly and sweet.

And if that didn't cross into my dreams, the gentle brush of his fingers on my forehead, smoothing back my hair surely did.

And I carried it with me all night long.  
-

At school, Quinn sat beside me in Glee, leafing through a baby catalog, her brow furrowed. "I don't know if I want the entire crib pink, or just white," she mused to herself. "Make it outlandish and gaudy as possible. You're going to spoil that child. You might as well need my knowledge," I offered, filing my nails. Quinn giggled and then groaned some, rubbing her stomach. "She started kicking during Biology class today. Want to feel?," she asked, eyes bright. I tenderly placed my palm on her belly, feeling the little nudger bump my hand. I gasped and withdrew, shocked. "That's her?," I breathed. "Yes!," she laughed. Mercedes cooed and placed her own dark hand on Quinn and felt it too. Soon, Tina and Artie wanted to feel, a little cocoon around the glowing mother. This felt wholesome and pure. Being apart of a human being growing. I smiled some and saw the door to the classroom open, revealing Puck, Matt, and Mike enter, Santana and Brittany not far behind. "What's going on over here?," he asked, his dark eyes flitting over the group.

"We're feeling the baby kick. It's probably the best thing ever," Artie said, enthralled with it all. Puck sneered and glanced at Quinn. "Why are you letting them touch you? Not like you at all, babe." Quinn's brown eyes narrowed dangerously and I knew her hormones kicked in. Turning to the football player, I gave him my best bitch glare. "She's had a change of heart, unlike you, Neanderthal."

Puck's face twisted, his fists balling. "Trying to be a bad-ass, Fairy? I would love to see you go against me, Hummel," he growled. "I would love to, but as you see, I just did my nails and I don't want to waste my perfect hands on the likes of you, N-O-A-H," I said firmly. Puck advanced to me, but was immediately held back by Matt and Mike. "Dude, it's not worth it!," Matt exclaimed, struggling with Puck. "The hell it isn't! I don't want him near you, Quinn! He might spread his disease to our baby!," he snarled, eyes flaming.

"Oh, HELL NAW, he DIDN'T!," Mercedes shouted, standing up and getting into full "Ghetto" mode.

"Hey, hey, HEY!," shouted Mr. Schuester, walking in with Rachel and Jesse. "What's going on in here?," he asked, startled. "Nothing more than the usual," Quinn said softly, eyes down on the floor. The class grew silent, albeit the heaving breathing from Puck, who threw back Mike and Matt, storming to the nearest chair near the door, away from us.

"Guys, we can't be like this with Regionals on our backs. There can't be a rift between us or else we'll fail. I thought all of this nonsense was settled," Mr. Schuester pressed, his voice slightly hurt. "We thought so, too," Mercedes sniffed, still irked at Puck. "Can't you all just get along until Regionals is over with?," Jesse sighed, rolling his eyes. "With Vocal Adrenaline, we never fought or got pissed so easily," he said offhandedly. "Well, this is New Directions, noob," Tina snapped back, shooting daggers at him. "In the end, all the arguing will more than likely strengthen us. Until then, mind your own business," she stated, earning a round of applause from the rest of us. I high-fived the Asian girl, who blushed heavily, pleased with herself speaking up for us.

Rachel said nothing but walked to her chair, shoulders slumped. She knew Jesse was going to complain about us to her later.

Finn walked in after all of that, all smiles. "Hey, guys! Uh... I must've missed something...," he trailed off, looking at us. I let out a giggle, and clamped my hand over my mouth, earning snickering from Artie, Mercedes, and Tina.

And like a river, the laughter rolled everyone until we were cracking up at the obvious blank look on Finn's face, even Puck.

"I'll never understand you kids, but in the meantime, man up and let's start rehearsing some song," Mr. Schue said, almost wearily but he looked thoughtfully on his students, amazed probably at our short-lived animosity.  
-

I, on the other hand, was happily walking to my car. No Slushie attacks, dumpster diving, or name-calling so much today. Nothing rained on my parade. I slid into the driver's side of my car and started it, Lady GaGa filling my speakers. I squealed some and turned up her song, singing along with her:

_"I want your horror and I want your design,_  
_I want your criminal as long as your mine,_  
_I want your love._  
_Love, love, love, I want your love!_

_I want your physco, your vertigo stick,_  
_want you in my rear window,_  
_baby, you're sick I want your love._  
_Love, love, love, I want your love!"_

"Lady GaGa, Kurt?," came a voice in my ear. Yelping, I turned and nearly rammed my head into Finn's. "You've GOT to stop sneaking up on me!," I whined, trying to calm my heart. He laughed and leaned into my car, listening to the song. I nearly passed out at the close proximity of him. _'Oh Judy Garland, please don't let me freak out!,'_ I prayed silently. "Ah, it's "Bad Romance". I've heard you sing this before with Brittany and Santana. What's so good about it?," he asked innocently, looking back over his shoulder at me. Was he TRYING to do this on purpose to me? I looked up to the ceiling and spoke in a dead-panned voice, "Nearly everything GaGa writes and sings is pure genuis. This song means that she'll take her lover no matter of his previous mess ups and relationships, no matter how ugly and twisted they were," I finished in a whisper.

"Oh. All of that from one song, huh? She must be passionate about her music," Finn mused to himself, pulling himself out of my car. I nodded dumbly and grasped my steering wheel for dear life. "She is... if there's nothing else to talk about, I must go do some shopping," I said, staring out of the windshield.

"Okay. Have fun."

I pressed my lips into a thin line and gave him a jerky smile until-

until...

"Do you want to help me tomorrow night with my song?"  
-

**HA!**  
**Cliff-hanger!**  
**I do this to keep you all entertained. Fwahaha.**  
**Until tomorrow, expect a chapter up probably THAT night or this weekend. I have a Jeffree Star concert to attend to Wednsday and going to see "Sex in the City:2" with my mom on Thursday. Such a busy girl...**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**"Foolish Games"- Jewel **  
**"Phantom of the Opera"- Gerard Butler and Emmy Rossum **  
**"Bad Romance"- Lady GaGa**


	4. Troubleshooting

**MONSTER**  
** A GLEE fanfic **  
**By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Four: Troubleshooting **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**Wow, you guys are so super amazing! -sniffles loudly- I didn't think that a lot of people wouldn't appreciate this story SO much! We all know we want that Kurt/Finn relationship to happen. If it doesn't, we know that at least we all will have out fanfiction universe. -laughs- So, should our darling boys continue to the next level...? I don't if I want to. Just to tease you all. Mwahahaha.**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
-

Mercedes watched me go about my room like a fiercely dressed hurricane, trying to make the place look presentable for Finn when we was to come over. "Kurt, I know you're kinda OCD when it comes to things, but this... is a little much," she said slowly, eying the newest additions of furniture and throw pillows and lights. "I'm trying to make him comfortable with the room. I mean, he obviously has not the eye to know fashion sense or inside decorum. When he walks in here, I want him to know that I-"

"Am a nut job?," Mercedes hinted at, flipping through a Vogue magazine. I pursed my lips as I halted in mid-fluff of my bedspread. "No... that I have taste. And that even though I'm not straight, I don't want to overwhelm him," I finished, eying my room. Mercedes rolled her eyes and then placed the magazine in her lap. "Kurt, you know I'm your best friend and that if you were going to embarrass yourself, I'd let you know. And right now-

you're going to fall over the cliff of no return," she said in a kind, but firm tone. I turned to argue with her, when I heard the doorbell ring. I let out a squeal and raced up stairs, flying past my father to open the door. _'Remember, Kurt; collective, calm, and awesome.'_ Taking a breath, I closed my eyes and inhaled, exhaled slowly. I grasped the doorknob and opened the door, revealing Finn, who stood there in his letterman, jeans, sneakers, and a funny look on his face. "I hope I'm interrupting your time with Mercedes," he said sheepishly, jerking his thumb towards her newly aquired set of wheels. I smiled charmingly and let him in. "No, of course not. She's going to leave soon- help make dinner at home," I said, walking him through the house. He nodded then sized up when my father came through the kitchen doorway.

"Oh, uuhh, hello, Mr. Hummel," Finn stammered. I glared quickly at Dad as he began to open his mouth. He shut it immediately. "Well, I suppose you two have Glee stuff to do. I'm just going to get some take-out for me and your mother and I'll... get out of your way," he finished, almost lamely and brushed passed us. "That was weird," Finn stated, looking back. "Yes, well, I didn't want any disruption during rehearsal," I declared and pushed him on down the stairs to my room, where Mercedes was pulling on her book bag. "Oh, hey, Finn. Kurt, I'm going to go. CALL me," she stressed and soon, she was out the door and it was me and my crush.

All alone.

I should have been more relaxed, but my insides were on fire, butterflies in my stomach, and my heart was going ninety-to-nothing. I walked over to my stereo system and flipped through my Ipod. "What song are you doing?," I asked politely, my back turned to him.

"Uhm... don't laugh when I tell you."

"Finn Hudson, I'm pretty sure there's nothing that will make me laugh at you."

"...okay. It's "An Ordinary Couple" from "The Sound of Music."

I looked back, eyes wide. Finn blushed and quickly glanced down at the floor. "It's a stupid choice," he mumbled, ashamed. "No! No, it's not that. I never expected you to know that song or the play," I confessed, turning away from my entertainment system. "Well, my mom watches the movie every Christmas with "It's A Wonderful Life", and I grew up watching it with her. So, it kind of stuck," he explained in a small voice. I smiled and approached him, arms crossed in front of my chest. "That's very kind of you to say that. But... isn't the song a duet?" Finn nodded, sitting down on my bed. "Yeah... that was the problem. But, it's the one song that stands out to me the most. And I was wondering if you could help me sing it."

"How would I be able to help?"

"Singing it with me."

I nearly fell over in sheer delight and honor. "Really?," I breathed, a large grin on my face. As I dazzled in the thrill of singing with Finn, a dark cloud soon covered over me. "Wait, what about Rachel? She usually sings with you on duets," I grounded out. Finn shrugged. "I wanted you to sing instead. I'm sure Mr. Schue can work something out. And I'll owe you one for helping me," he smiled.

I nodded at the acceptance and for the next hour and a half, Finn and I sung together in my basement room and there was nothing else that I wanted more.  
-

But there more to happen later that week that put a hold on our lessons and my chance to sing my Phantom song. With Jesse St. James being from Vocal Adrenaline, our rival school for Regionals, all of the Glee members, minus Rachel, felt like soon he would sabotage us and we pretty much gave him the cold shoulder. It turned out that the coach of the group, one Shelby Corcoran , ended up being Rachel's... mother? Apparently, she got knocked up and gave up her child to Rachel's now gay fathers. She found all of this out by spying on Vocal Adrenaline with Quinn and Mercedes when we found out they were working on a routine to my beautiful muse, Lady GaGa.

Of course, as an assignment, the girls and I made our own GaGa costumes that she had worn and performed "Bad Romance" while the boys decided on performing a Kiss song.

But in between that, Finn and I almost had a falling out. My dad wanted Carole and Finn to move in with us, and I ended up getting carried away with the redecorating and caused... well, some tension with Finn and I.

Each day that I wore my Lady GaGa costume, I was thrown around and nearly beaten by Karvosky and his leeches of a hockey team.

The last day, I thought it would be the end of me when I saw Finn appear in the doorway, dressed head to toe in patent red and red glitter eye masks on. He was wearing GaGa's dress when she saw the Queen... typical Finn. From then, I knew that something was going to happen. He had said it himself, trying to apologize that same day:

"I am different."  
-

I looked at Quinn, confused. "So, you're not keeping the baby, but you and Puck are naming her Beth? What about the crib? It was so precious!"  
The blonde gave me a look and smiled sadly. "You know I can't keep up with a baby. And, it's the right decision. I may regret it later, but I know I'm doing what's right for her," she whispered, rubbing her belly protectively. I pursed my lips as I ran a hand through the clothes on the rack. "Okay, but I warn you- you'll end up getting sentimental and then, you'll want her. It's a mother intuition thing." Quinn looked down at a shirt, her mouth stretching somewhat wider. "I doubt it, but if it happens, I'll blame you."

To cheer the blonde up, I had taken her shopping after school one beautiful afternoon. The whole drama with Finn and I had lightened up, and he and his mother was still at my house. I bit down on my bottom lip and tugged a sweater out of the rack. "Do you think... that I make Finn uncomfortable?," I asked sincerely. Quinn blinked, her dark eyes wide. "What do you mean by that? Are you still worried about the whole room problem?" I sighed dramatically and walked over to a chair, sitting down heavily- not like me at all. "Its been in my head for quite awhile. I don't know how to deal with this without going completely "gay" over it."

"That was the first time I think I heard you say the word "gay"," Quinn mused, holding a flowy, powder blue blouse with lace ribbing. "I don't say it often. Only in dire circumstances," I sighed, fixing my bangs. "He's fine at the moment. I want to make sure he's okay while staying with me. I know that the jocks at school are picking on him... thinking that something is going to happen. I think Finn is still stuck up on Rachel for some "unknown" reason. If he's going to like somebody, I wish it was someone else than her," I muttered angrily, grinding my teeth together. Quinn placed the shirt over her arm and walked towards me, her face soft. "I know you'd rather it be you. But, Kurt, I don't think Finn... can change... you know."

I know she meant to be sincere and honest, but it cut through me like the day Mercedes threw the rock in my car window. It was painful. "Not even?," I questioned, my stomach churning. "I think he can't- won't. But you know, it is the two-thousands. Anything can happen," she offered, placing a hand on my shoulder.  
-

There was only three days left until Friday when Mr. Schuester would listen to us sing our Broadway songs.

And I was thinking that perhaps he made the horrible decision in giving me "Phantom of the Opera" as my lesson. I sat in the empty auditorium on the piano bench, my fingers running over the ebony and ivory keys tenderly, humming a tune to myself as I fought with my inner demons. Finn and him not ever loving me. Singing my song and blowing it, Rachel's face sneering at me. Mr. Schue's face crest-fallen and disappointed in me. Finn turning away from me. Finn, Finn, FINN. Every thought was HIM.

Groaning angrily, I hit my hands on the keys, a horrid sound echoing around me. Yes, I was angry and bitter. There was no way that I was ever capable of loving my crush and he in return. The mockery and threats alone were just enough to not allow someone with me. Tears smarted my eyes when I thought of that. My poor father having to look over his shoulder constantly to protect me. Like Finn...

he was always protecting me.

I sniffled and wiped my eyes. And just in time.

"Are you okay, Kurt?," came the kind tone from Finn. I clenched my jaw and tried to look fabulous, even when hurting deeply. "Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?," I snapped back, standing up.

"... because, where I was standing, tears usually mean someone isn't okay. Unless the rules changed or something," Finn continued, coming near me. I edged away quickly, gathering my shoulder bag. "Something was in my eye. That was it. Now if you'll excuse me," I mumbled, my back turned to him still as I walked away. "Wait- Kurt! Please?," he called out, grabbing at me. Turning some, I glared at him as best as I could. "What now?," I bit out, trying to tug my arm away from him. Finn stared down at me with his curious dark eyes, his mouth set, as if working something in his mind. "Something is wrong... did someone do something to you? If they did, I'll kick their ass," he threatened lowly, almost growling. I swallowed the large lump that had formed in my throat as he suddenly went all heroic on me. "No... it wasn't that," I whispered hoarsely, feeling my legs lock together. "What was it? Remember, I owe you one, don't I?," Finn pointed out, smiling some.

"I was... just thinking about how Mr. Schue wants us to bring out our true talents with our songs, right? Well, what if I don't have it? I'd end up disappointed so many people and being snubbed by one particular one who doesn't know how to dress herself," I grumbled. "How could that be, man? I mean, you do have a pretty sweet voice, even if you are a dude," Finn said encouragingly.

I gave him a watery smile as I consciously drew closer to him. "Thank you, Finn. That was nice of you to say. But still, no one wants to be near a homosexual soprano that has impeccable fashion taste and fashion and... who in return, will probably be alone forever," I finished with a flair of dramatics, turning my head away. "Why do you say that? You're only bringing yourself down, Kurt," Finn said soothingly. Silence then wrapped around us, the only sound was our breathing. I looked up slowly at him, my face blank of emotion. I felt it- my body subconsciously standing at the precipice, ready to fall straight into Finn's arms that would let me go... _'he wouldn't though, would he?'_

My mouth opened, my tongue feeling thick like a slab of cotton and my heart pounding in my ears like a ocean. Oh God... I was going to tell him everything...! I could _FEEL_ it! I choked back on my words, my brow furrowing in sadness until Finn leaned down, hugging me close to him. My face buried in the crook of his shoulder and neck, the smell of his letter man and cologne washing over him. "F-Finn?," I stammered, daring to believe. "Don't look like that!," he hissed, almost scared. "Like what?," I asked dreamily, my hands coming up to press against his back. "Like you are going to say something you'll regret. Like your going to die."

I stifled a mounting sob and pressed my forehead into his shoulder, gripping at him. "You don't know... you don't know...," I repeated, tears now freely going down my face. I was ashamed at myself. I'd never let my emotions get the best of me in front of people and here I was, wailing in Finn's arms. "Then let me know!," he begged, pulling back. I shook my head, my bangs falling into my eyes. "You of all people don't need to know," I stressed, trying now to get away.

"Why? Because if it is about me, I have the right to know," Finn said, putting his hands on my shoulders, weighing me down.

I said nothing.

Finn frowned, his eyes narrowing. "Not talking? Okay, fine..."

I was hauled over to the piano and pressed against the side of it, the glossy and smooth surface easy on my impact. I cried out in surprise and then was silenced-

Finn proved his point to me, but only by giving me the ultimate pay pack and letting everything I had covered in ice inside of me instantly melt. The unraveling of everything was coming to the end of the string as I lip-locked with the Glee club's lead male singer.

And the only thought that crossed my mind was, _"I wonder if Rachel would walk in now..."_  
-

**Whoa.**  
**WHOA.**

**There's some little smutt-smutt for you guys. -grins-**  
**I know there wasn't any songs. This particular chapter didn't need any.**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**


	5. Epic Fail

**MONSTER**  
** A GLEE fanfic **  
**By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Five: Epic Fail **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**Okay, seriously, you guys...**  
**ARE AWESOME! The reviews I've been getting lately are nothing short of amazing. -grins- Now, the thing about the fanfiction universe is that we write what we WANT and what I've heard for "GLEE" later on in the series is that my darling Kurt gets a boyfriend, but I DOUBT it will be anything serious. I mean... he'll always have eyes for Finn. But who knows- things have surprised the general public before. XD Like always...**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
**BY THE WAY! Remember the "High F" in "Defying Gravity"? Oh yeah. I totally hit it.**  
-

If you could, for a moment, be in my spot like I am now. My fantasy was set before me and my mouth was covered with Finn Hudson's lips like a gift sent from McQueen. I was so overwhelmed that I did the most natural thing-

I responded.

What can I say? Us teenagers have raging hormones.

I might have startled him some, but the next thing I knew, he put much more vigor into the kiss, his hands holding my head in place while my own drifted to rest on his shoulders. This was a dream come true, but I knew I had to break it. Then, I pulled back, panting for air in my lungs as I stared wordlessly at the football player, who stared back, his mouth glistening and eyes smoldering. I shook my head and looked down. "Finn... this isn't right. Something doesn't feel right about this," I mumbled thickly, over-come with emotion. "What are you talking about, Kurt?," Finn asked, slightly hurt, holding me closer.

"This! This, what you're doing! Are you positive you know exactly what you're doing instead of going by what you want physically?," I asked, trying not to drown in his dark brown eyes that loomed over me.

"What do you _want_ me to say, though? I can't be with Quinn because my best friend knocked her up, Rachel has Jesse and has clearly gotten over me, and you... YOU have been on my mind ever since Lady GaGa! Kurt, you're always in my head!," Finn confessed, his voice steely with passion.

I blinked at him with wide eyes, daring to believe everything that fell from his mouth. "You're confused. So confused... you can't think of me when you know once Regionals happen, something is going down and I'll be shoved to the back and you'll be there to save the day with Rachel on your side. I think... you're in love with the "idea" of me, Finn," I blurted out, taking my head away from his hands.

He stood there, stunned, as I moved away from him, walking out of the auditorium. "Until you know exactly what you want, Finn Hudson, come find me. Because if you do, remember what you'll have to deal with once I'm yours. It's not just the Slushies, it's the threats and the teasing... think about it," I told him in a cracked voice, new tears fresh on my face as I tore myself from Finn. As I walked into the darkened backrooms, I knew that I broke something in him.

And my own heart.

But I was doing it sorely for both of us. I knew I wanted him. I knew I loved him. But he doesn't know what or who he wants _really_.

Once I entered into McKinley's hallways, I joined up with Mercedes and looked as if nothing happened and I didn't cry over my brave, but foolish decision.

Two people would hurt tonight in the same house.

**GLEE Club song **  
-

The lights fix on Kurt as he begins to sing, dressed in a black button down and white pants, his hair ruffled and hands clenched at his side as the club stands behind him, his chorus this time as he opens his mouth to sing one of Paramore's songs"

_"Oh no sir,_  
_Well I don't want to be the blame, not anymore._  
_It's your turn _  
_To take scene for settling the final score and  
why do we lie to hurt so much again?_  
_This time,_  
_you have made it harder just to go on,_  
_and why all the possibilities,_  
_ well I was wrong."_

He jumps around, acting like a rock singers with the Glee member's dancing and singing.

_"That's what you get when you let your heart win _  
_Whoa-!_  
_That's what you get when you let your heart win _  
_Whoa-!_  
_I drowned out all my sense away the sound of its beating._  
_And that's what you get when you let your heart win."_

Kurt turns slightly to look at Finn, who comes to him, all smiles then it vanishes when Kurt ignores him.

_"I wonder,_  
_how am I supposed to feel,_  
_when you're not here?_  
_Cause I've earned,_  
_every bridge I've ever built._  
_When you were here,_  
_I still try,_  
_holding onto silly things I never earned._  
_Oh why do we lie to hurt so much?_  
_And why,_  
_All the possibilities,_  
_I'm sure you've heard."_

_"That's what you get when you let your heart win  
Whoa-!_  
_That's what you get when you let your heart win  
Whoa-!_  
_I drowned out all my sense away,_  
_the sound of its beating._  
_And that's what you get when you let your heart win."_

Slowly, Kurt approaches Finn, a finger tracing over his chest, almost dauntingly, his eyelashes fluttering as the older teen grins a large smile then is pushed away by who he wants.

_"Make your way to me,_  
_to me,_  
_and I'll always be just so inviting._  
_If I ever start to think strange,_  
_this heart will start a riot in me._  
_Let's start,_  
_start HEY!"_

Kurt sings almost mournfully as he reaches for Finn, and instead, turns away, his attention back to the audience, eyes gleaming.

_"Why do we lie to hurt so much?_  
_oh why do we lie to hurt so much?"_

The chorus backs him up, loudly and hands pumping in the air.

_"That's what you get when you let your heart win _  
_Whoa-!_  
_That's what you get when you let your heart win _  
_Whoa-!_  
_That's what you get when you let your heart win _  
_Whoa-!"_

Kurt holds himself as he finishes, hunching over with such intensity, he almost burns.

_"Now I can't trust myself,_  
_with anything but this,_  
_and that's what you get when you let your heart win._  
_Whoa...!"_

He finishes loudly, so powerful and throws himself down on the stage floor as the bands ends with much energy and gusto as Finn steps away from the chorus and stares at Kurt, sadness etched on his face as the spotlight fades away, leaving them in darkness.

-  
**Kurt's POV **  
-

Two days before the lesson was to be done, I sat in my room, holding my sheet music as I studied it. Of course, I knew the song, but I wanted to make sure I would hit every exact note and not hear Rachel say I messed up somewhere. As if. I hummed to myself as I touched the vintage Dior scarf around my neck that Mercedes and myself had found luckily. It was a deep scarlet, almost black in the shadows. The one color Finn had said I looked good in. A coldness crept in my heart and I shuddered at it.

Actually...

we hadn't spoken a word to each other since that day.

All looks were icy, bleak, and empty from both ends. We were only polite when my dad and Carole spoke to one of us and we were in the same room. It was so unbearable, I compared it to Valentino versus Cavalli.

School seemed to not exist in my book.

I sighed quietly and proceeded to get ready for bed, taking care of my nightly ritual of showering, applying my products on my face and easing into comfy clothes. I padded over to my bed, picking up the scarf and got into bed, the lamp near the stairs still on. I laid down with the piece of clothing next to my face as I stared at it. I knew Finn was pissed at me because I didn't give him what he wanted-

I'm pretty sure he was unsure of himself as well, and just going on animal instincts of getting _something_ out of somebody. I squashed out the idea of him running to Rachel after I left him and whimpered, turning my face into my pillow. I tried to think of something pleasant to make me falls asleep early before Finn came down to go to bed. I turned over so my back faced the stairs._ 'Go on, Kurt. Fall asleep. Think of Robert Downey Jr.,'_ I repeated to myself, feeling the faint tingle of sleep in my feet. Then, I heard the thudding of his feet and my heart stopped- nearly.

I gripped my pillow, eyes glued to the wall.

There was something electrifying the air. Oh, no. Finn was _still_ pissed. I pressed my lips together tightly as I heard him shuffling around, mumbling under his breath. Thank God I trained myself to act like I was asleep or else, I could be dead right now. Or worse... no longer apart of Finn's life. The light went off and soon, there was silence. I let out a quiet, shaky breath and waited to see what would happen.

And then, I felt my bed dip.

_'Versace, please, don't let him kill me.'_

"Kurt... you awake?," Finn asked in a tiny voice, the sound like it was bruised. I pursed my lips in the dark and then spoke, "Yes. What is it?"

"I wanted to... apologize about the other day. I didn't mean to do all of that. I know you're kind of sensitive about things like that. I was a jerk. Can you forgive me?," he pleaded, touching my shoulder. The spark zapped through me and I nearly jolted. "It's not that I'm sensitive, I don't want both of us looking like fools and broken-hearted," I tossed at him, rather bitchy-like. "... remember... that time we were supposed to sing ballads to each other?," Finn brought up, the memory slicing through me like a sharp knife. I drew in a sharp intake of air. "Yes. I do."

"You wanted to sing "I Honestly Love You" and I didn't know exactly how to take that... and when I asked my mom, she let me listen to it. Olivia-Newton John has a good voice still. But, anyway, I listened to the lyrics and... Kurt, I think... I've liked you since you were the only one to stand by me during the preggers situation. And whenever I was sad or upset, you were there. No one else was. I can't ignore something like that," Finn said slowly, almost soothingly. I sat up in bed, trying to focus in the dark. "Why, Finn Hudson, there is some sense in that thick head of yours," I said lightly, teasingly.

"So... do you forgive me?"

"I do forgive you, but did you understand what I was _trying_ to get across?"

"Yeah, I think. Pretty much, no Rachel, no Quinn, no anyone. Just you. It had always been you," he mused, one of his hands finding mine and gave it a small squeeze.

My face grew hot and I ducked my head, biting my bottom lip.

"I can't seem to believe this. It's all happening so fast," I whispered. "Then, let's take it slow," Finn offered, finding my face with his free hand and ran his fingers over the smooth surface of my cheek. I leaned into the touch and closed my eyes.

"Finn... please don't lead me on," I whimpered, still daring to believe.

My mouth sought his and we kissed deeply, fusing together hotly. He was somewhat timid, then got bolder, asking permission to come inside. I opened my mouth to him and tongues danced together, our fingers clutching at one another. I don't know precisely how long we made out, but I do know that later on, sleepily, I woke to find Finn's body beside mine protectively, sleeping away soundly. I smiled stupidly, butterflies waking along my skin. I snuggled into his embrace more and soon, my dreams involved us together, both in designer clothes, and at a beach.  
-

And as I stared at my reflection in the mirror in the morning, I was unhappy.

Because everything that happened, what I _thought_ happened... didn't. My dreams were playing tricks on me again and it was now Friday and Finn had yet to speak to me.  
-

_"Boy, we've had a real good time and _  
_I wish you the best on your way..._  
_Eh Eh, there's nothing else I can say."_  
-

**Damn. That was LOW.**  
**For me, anyway.**  
**Don't worry- Kurt WILL get his in the end. And sorry for the crappy Glee Club sing-along. You know, when they do the numbers on stage and it's all "WHOA! Crazy good and big!" Yeah... mine is LAME. XD**  
**I love you guys!**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**"That's What You Get"- Paramore **  
**"Eh Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say)"- Lady GaGa**


	6. Friends

**MONSTER **  
**A GLEE fanfic**  
**By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Six: Friends **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn.**  
**Kurt is feeling the cold shoulder, Finn might be getting his feelings confused with his hormones, and will our boys finally get together? I have no idea. Also, this is a short chapter because I wanted to focus on Kurt and the rest of the club members basically... telling him something. -grins largely- Also, can we NOT agree that last night's episode tops the Madonna and GaGa episode? "I felt something from the neck down." God, I love you Jane Lynch.**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
-

_'What would you think if I sang out of tune,_  
_Would you stand up and walk out on me?_  
_Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song,_  
_And I'll try not to sing out of key._  
_Oh I get by with a little help from my friends,_  
_Mmm, I get high with a little help from my friends,_  
_Mmm, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends.'_

It wasn't that I was ready to face the music... I didn't want to face Finn.

All morning long, I ignored him as he ignored me. Mercedes, Tina, and Artie knew something was up and before my English class, they surrounded me and drug me to the auditorium before the bell could ring. "Okay, white boy, you've got some serious explaining to do," Mercedes interjected at once. I stared at her coolly and crossed my arms over my chest. "There is nothing to say. What, just because one day I hardly speak means there's something wrong with me? What if I was sick?," I argued. "You'd still have your bitchy mannerism," Tina said, almost smugly. "Oh... or, or what if I lost my voice?," I questioned, getting rather mad. "Again... your expression would let us know what was up," Artie sighed. I growled low in my throat and stomped my foot, very unladylike of me. "It's nothing... okay?"

"So... yesterday was a whole lot of nothing?," Mercedes asked in a soft tone, her eyes sad. "And the day before that?," Tina added, placing her hands on the back of Artie's wheelchair, who looked up at me almost with pity. I swallowed and nervously pushed back some of my hair. "Yes. Yes, it was," I whispered hoarsely. Footsteps approached us, echoing like some forbidding sign. We looked up to see Rachel standing there in a plaid blue and black skirt and a ridiculous ruffled, pink blouse that looked like she picked it up at Goodwill... or Target. She was looking at me, biting down on her bottom lip and eyes straying to the floor. "That's not what I told them," she said in a tiny voice. I blanched then started seeing red. "And what does the great Rachel Berry know, hm? Does she know of anything that is going on with me right now or did you eavesdrop your way into this predicament?," I challenged, my hands now going onto my hips in diva-formation.

"No... I saw what happened between... you and Finn."

_'Do you need anybody?_  
_I need somebody to love._  
_Could it be anybody?_  
_I want somebody to love.'_

I can't say that I didn't wish this on me... because I _wanted_ her to see me and Finn kiss the other day. I wanted to show her that he had chosen me over her not because I wasn't a girl, but that I finally got to the top of his totem pole. What was she going to do now- throw it back at my face and pranced around, singing in off-key "I told you so!" at me? I shifted on one foot to the other, ignoring the hottness on my cheeks. "What did you see, Rachel?," I asked loudly, chin jutting up. Rachel didn't say a word to me but instead walked up to me, her face so full of sympathy and her darkwood eyes of brow shinning. She paused for a moment, unsure, and then...

wrapped her arms around me and hugged me close.

I'm sure a collective gasp went on behind me as I was frozen with shock at the horror before me. The smell of strawberries and honeysuckle was nearly choking me, coming from her chocolate brown locks of hair, but for a moment, I was taken back to my mother's dresser. That same smell laid somewhere in one of the drawers along with her other smell of vanilla and violets. I drew in a shuddering breath and tried to fight back my tears. "It's okay, Kurt. Please... don't push us away. Or me. I want to help you because... I think I know what you're going through," Rachel whispered in my ear, pulling back to look at me, not of spite or hate, but like...

like a mother would.

"What, that Finn will never chose me? That it will always be you?," I bit back, furious at her and myself for looking so unmanly. "No. That you can see it in both of you and there's nothing going on. You both are killing yourselves. I know that it won't be me anymore, because... I can't win everything... but this particular gold star I've wanted... was meant for you instead," Rachel smiled, her hands warm on my shoulders as she told me she was giving up the fight because it was already evident who was the winner all along.

I felt three other bodies near me and as the wave of sudden tears crashed over me, I allowed myself to be held and patted on the back as my Glee friends comforted me.

_'What do I do when my love is away._  
_(Does it worry you to be alone?)_  
_How do I feel by the end of the day (Are you sad because you're on your own)_  
_No, I get by with a little help from my friends,_  
_Mmm, get high with a little help from my friends,_  
_Mmm, gonna to try with a little help from my friends.'_  
-

I was cornered by no other than Noah Puckerman by my locker before lunch, who glared at me with hooded eyes. "Yes?," I asked haughtily, holding my books to my chest tightly. "Finn's been acting kinda shifty. Any idea why, Hummel?," he questioned, leaning towards me. I frowned and straightened my form. "No, I don't know, Noah. Maybe you should ask him. I haven't spoken to him in day," I sniffed and tried to get away, only to be slammed back into the wall of lockers by Puck's strong hand. "That's the problem, Fairy Queen. He started acting like this when you two had worked together that night at your house."

"How did you know about that?"

"He called me earlier that day... wanting to know how to charm a person properly-"

I raised a brow. "And he called you, asking THAT?"

_'Do you need anybody?_  
_I need somebody to love._  
_Could it be anybody?_  
_I want somebody to love.'_

Puck rolled his eyes toward the ceiling. "C'mon, Hummel- I'm a stud. We all know this except for you. But anyway, yeah, when he said he was going to some chick's house, I got curious and followed him instead... to YOUR house," Puck said, leaning down on the locker with his shoulder. I got pissed. "You were spying on us?," I hissed, feeling violated. "Well... I wanted to see who made him all so happy... it's kind of sickening, if you think about it. Finn, acting all gooey-eyed and stuff," he pouted some, looking away. I blinked at this statement and felt my heart flutter in my chest. "... was he acting like that because... because of me?," I dared believe.

"I guess so. But I'm going to get a thing straight- there's only one person to make miserable, and that's me. I screwed up so many things for him and I'll go on forever feeling guilty for it," Puck stated firmly, pointing a finger at my face. I blinked and waited with baited breath for him to go on. "So, I guess what I'm trying to say is... damn. Look, don't mess this up for him. And you. There- I've said my piece. Now, go get him," Puck threatened, pulling me away from the locker and shoving me into the hallway, grinning.

I mirrored his own smile and knew that if I had Rachel and Puck tell me it was okay now, I could go after Finn.

It was worth having friends that would be there, especially if they were in Glee club.

_'Would you believe in a love at first sight?_  
_Yes, I'm certain that it happens all the time._  
_What do you see when you turn out the light?_  
_I can't tell you, but I know it's mine._  
_Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends,_  
_Mmm I get high with a little help from my friends,_  
_Oh, I'm gonna try with a little help from my friends.'_  
-

However, I knew there was still one obstacle.

Quinn Fabray.

I sought her out in the lunchroom, gripping my tray of salad and organic apple juice so tightly, I might have broken skin. I walked to her as she poked at her own food while looking at a baby book for when she would be ready to deliver. "H-hey, Quinn... mind if I sit?," I stammered, already feeling the cold dread of humiliation overcome me. The blonde looked up and smiled brightly. "Sure!"

I sat down and soon, we began a light conversation, talking about this and that until I grew quiet, shredding my napkin to tiny pieces. Quinn looked at my pile and then up at me. "Kurt, something's up. Do... you wanna talk about it?," she asked sincerely. I sighed nad buried my face in my hands. "Quinn, I'm in love with Finn and a couple of days ago, he kissed me but I pushed him away to make the decision if he really cared for me and not just some teenager hormonal thing and if he did like me, he had to make sure he wasn't still hung up on you and Rachel," I blurted out in a fast rush, feeling sick to my stomach.

_'Do you need anybody?_  
_I just need someone to love._  
_Could it be anybody?_  
_I want somebody to love.'_

Quinn didn't say anything for a moment until I felt her hand on my arm, turning me to face her. When I looked up into her rounded face, I saw her eyes shinning and lips trembling. "I figured as much... especially when Finn came to me, asking for help." I was stunned at this. Finn had come to Quinn too... looking for solace and her blessing. "And?," I asked shakily. Quinn shook her head, her blonde hair moving with her. "I don't mind it. Knowing that you would make him happy than what I could. I mean... I screwed around with his best friend, got pregnant and lost him to Rachel Berry," she stressed out. "But when he told me... that he started liking you, it scared him. I mean, Lima isn't the best place to be gay- no offense."

"None taken."

"But when he talked to me about you... Kurt, I swear he was flying. Like no one else mattered."

Quinn wiped her eyes and turned away, smiling some. "I think it's funny... how we all used to pick on one another, and now... you get your happy ending. In a way, I think this will let us all get what we want," she whispered, holding her belly. I let out the breath I was holding and stood, picking the girl up with me and embraced her tightly. "Out of everyone's opinion, yours was the one I needed," I said softly to her. Quinn gripped onto me and pulled back some, laughing a little. "Really? The knocked-up former head cheerleader made sense to a gay, fashion diva?," she teased.

"More than what you could imagine."

_'Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends,_  
_Mmm, gonna try with a little help from my friends _  
_Ooh, I get high with a little help from my friends _  
_Yes I get by with a little help from my friends,_  
_with a little help from my friends.'_  
-

**Okay, do NOT throw things at me! I told you this was going to be a short chapter because... I'm working on a BETTER ONE.**  
**-grin-**  
**Trust me, it'll be the most epic thing you'll ever read.**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**'With A Little Help From My Friends.'- The Beatles**


	7. Phantom

**MONSTER**  
**A GLEE fanfic**  
**By: Something Dysfunctional**  
**Chapter Seven: Phantom**  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**Sorry it has been taking me so long to write out this chapter. Currently, some of the keys on my laptop are NOT working, such as my semi-colon, colon, the right-handed shift key, and my M button. Nor can I use my comas. So basically... I copying and pasting. Ugh. Do you SEE the pain that I am going through for you all? Because I love you guys. -snerks- I'm thinking of finishing up the story soon, but not with a bang. I know I rated it T, but... as a bonus, if I get, oh I don****'****t know... about 30 or more reviews, I'll throw in a SMUTTY chapter. Yes, that's right... I'm bringing out the big guns. I normally don't write a sex scene for certain things unless it's straight-up yaoi, but for Kurt and Finn, I'm willing to make an exception. What do you all think?**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
-

I knew that sooner or later today, I was going to see Finn. As I walked slowly into the Glee Club room, I felt a sense of dread. Or perhaps an over-estimation of what I _wanted_ to happen when I sailed into the room. Finn's eyes raking over me, walking towards me in that stealthy manner and kissing me in front of everybody. Oh, yes... I truly was a diva and drama queen at heart. I shook the image from my mind and with my head held high, I crossed the threshold to where everyone else was at. I casually walked over to Mercedes and placed my stuff down, sitting in a chair and crossing my legs. Today is the day. "Are you nervous?", she asked me, going over her music one last time. I shrugged and placed my fingers over the Dior scarlet scarf that I wore around my neck, like I had in my dream. "Not even the tiniest bit. Rachel might have been nice to me earlier today, but it's still a competition between me and her in music. She thought that Phantom didn't belong to me. Well, we are going to see about that," I sniffed some, graciously tossing back my head.

Speak of the devil and she shall appear... the brunette walked in, flashing me a smile, in which I gave her one in reply, very prissy, but I didn't care. Soon, Finn traveled behind, his hands deep in his pants pockets and a haunted look about his handsome face. I gnawed on my bottom lip, cautious and worried. Did he look that way because of me? He brushed past me to sit on the upper level of stands. Timid, I glanced back, still sucking on my lip. He looked up for the tiniest fraction and, if it was possible, he zoomed in on my face, looking intently at my mouth. I flushed and ducked y head, embarrassed and... a little turned on. I turned around, still idly playing with my scarf. I knew I had to get my final point across today with my music. Things had rapidly changed so much in such a short amount of time- his mom and my dad, dating. Almost living together. The GaGa incident with him standing up for me against the hockey team. All those times... of him protecting me, and what did I have to show for it?

Not really a damn thing.

Mr. Schuester walked in, clapping his hands to get our attentions. He had a sad, yet proud look upon his face as we got quiet and listened to him speak.

"Okay, class, it's time for your assignments that I gave you! The point of it all was to draw out your strengths in singing, performing, and... what really matters to you as a Glee member. I know it's been a bad time, with Jesse going back to Vocal Adrenaline... and probably running his mouth to Shelby of how we perform, but that's okay. Because we are going to show them at Regionals what we are all about. Now, who would like to go first?," he asked in a challenging tone, eyes twinkling. Some of the members were pumped up by his little speech, but as ever, Rachel wanted to go first, singing "Don't Cry For Me, Argentina" from Evita. Then, Quinn surprised me by singing next, her song from Chicago, a la "Roxie". The next thing I knew, Santana and Brittany were singing a duet from Wicked, "For Good". Tina sung "Out Tonight" from RENT and Artie gave a sad, yet chilling performance of "I've Grown Accustomed To Her Face" from My Fair Lady. Mercedes, however, shook the house with "You Can't Stop The Beat" from Hairspray. Matt and Mike followed in suit with a number from The Producers, the quirky song, "We Can Do It".

When the boys were done, Puck walked silently down to the piano, hands in his pockets as he turned and faced us, face solemn. He nodded to the band, and in the most heart-felt ways, he crooned out "Sandy" from Grease. I turned to look at Quinn, who was perched at the edge of her seat, so still like a statue and tears trembling on her long eyelashes. She knew he was singing it to her. I glanced back at Puck, who had a range of emotions running over his dark features, but pain stood out the most.

When he finished, the class erupted in applause, some of the girls sniffling, myself included.

I wiped my eyes hastily and then stood, a hand on my hip. "Mr. Schuester, if you mind, I would like to go now," I said in a confident tone, so sure of myself. He nodded, almost eager for me to show the class what I could do. I stopped and then turned swiftly on the tips of my feet, my chin held high. "Today, I shall perform the song from Phantom of the Opera, "All I Ask Of You". Brad, you may start," I politely instructed the pianist. The first few notes danced in the air as I closed my eyes, readying myself to sing both parts...

alone.

For the briefest moment, I was terrified and so ashamed for having acting the way I did to Finn. Maybe he wasn't my Phantom. Perhaps... all along he was my Raoul.

I opened my mouth to begin when I was interrupted by another. I opened my eyes so fast, I believed to have gotten whiplash. Finn stood up from his seat, eyes blazing and set on my own so fiercely that I forgot to breathe right. I forgot he knew what song I was singing! And he pulls this? I nearly swooned at the idea of him remembering this song. As he sung to me, he walked down to the front, everyone looking on interestingly and Mr. Schue confused:

_"No more talk of darkness,_  
_Forget these wide-eyed fears I'm here, _  
_nothing can harm you my words will warm and calm you_  
_ Let me be your freedom,_  
_let daylight dry your tears._  
_I'm here with you, beside you,_  
_to guard you and to guide you..."_

I drew in a breath, and began softly, daring to hope as he circled around me...

_"Say you love me every waking moment,_  
_turn my head with talk of summertime._  
_Say you need me with you now and always..._  
_Promise me that all you say is true love me,_  
_ that's all I ask of you."_

Finn stood next to me, looking down so intently, his eyes dark, yet warm like freshly-dug earth, keeping me entranced-

_"Let me be your shelter,_  
_let me be your light._  
_You're safe, _  
_No one will find you _  
_your fears are far behind you."_

I turned, suppressing a shudder, before he raised his hand to grasp my shoulder.

_"All I want is freedom,_  
_a world with no more night_  
_ and you, always beside me,_  
_ to hold me and to hide me..."_

He pressed near my side, taking his hands and placing them on my arms, turning me back as he continued to sing, a smile gracing his features.

_"Then say you'll share with me one love,_  
_ one lifetime_,  
_ let me lead you from your solitude._  
_Say you need me with you here, beside you._  
_Anywhere you go, let me go too._  
_ Oh Kurt, that's all I ask of you."_

I wanted to hide myself in his arms as he had sung my name, but I kept my face up, eyes brimming with those unruly, unshed tears. This was it... it was closing to the end. Finn told me he had watched the movie before and the play on YouTube. I wondered if he would... kiss me again, like Raoul and Christine did in the song. I sang loudly now, my adrenaline rushing as my heart soared with each note-

_"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime,_  
_say the word and I will follow you..."_

Our voiced now melded together, sweet and honeyed almost.

_"Share each day with me,_  
_each night, each morning."_

I closed my eyes as I let the next line rush past my lips as his presence drew near to me.

_"Say you love me..."_

He mirrored my own tone, so soft and right.

_"You know I do..."_

Together, we sung the last bit, foreheads pressed together.

_"Love me - that's all I ask of you."_

I pulled away, looking into his face, searching that he was being sincere and truthful with everything he just sung to me. Finn placed a hand on my cheek, cradling it close as the last part of the song came to an end.

_"Anywhere you go let me go, too._  
_Love me - that's all I ask of you..."_

There was silence in the room until I heard a voice pipe up, innocent and naive, I knew it could only be her:

"So... are you like, going to kiss him... or not, Finn?," Brittany asked, her fingers twirling in her blonde ponytail, blue eyes lit up mischievously. Finn groaned at the artless question, causing the silence to break in roaring laughter. I laughed along, holding onto Finn's arms. "Well?," Santana asked, grinning wildly. I looked up at Finn, who was staring at me. "What do I have to loose?," he murmured, ducking his head and claimed my second kiss on my lips. I soared at the sensation, ignoring the cat-calls and my Glee teacher's plea of everyone calming down in a rather teasing tone, only focusing on the boy that was in front of me. No one revolved around my world more that he did.

And that's all I could ask of him.  
-

As I sat on the hood of my Navigator, the sun was setting and a cool wind was picking up. I held the scarf that held the color Finn said looked good on me.

Pressing my lips together, I debated on letting it go in the wind, for a symbolic move on my part when a hand wrapped around my own, bringing it up to lay my palm on a sturdy chest. "You're not thinking of letting that go, are you?," Finn asked seriously, a brow raised. I shrugged, turning my nose up in the air. "Why not? Every diva has a signature move. Mine might as well be letting this vintage scarf blow away in the wind, like at the end of a sappy, romance movie with Barbra Streisand", I sighed. Finn chuckled and brushed away some of my hair, eying me curiously.

"I never could understand you, but... I think I kind of do", he mused. I smiled coyly, fingers playing along his collarbone, watching the scarf entwine around the pale digits.

"Finn Hudson, you may never understand me. No one will, but for the moment... understand this- there is no one else I would have fallen for that day in the hallway but you. Impulse control turned out to be a good thing", I laughed, tossing back my head. Finn joined me and then sat beside me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "I never though this would happen to me either, but... I like it", he murmured, pressing a kiss on my temple.

"You sure? No regrets?"

"None."  
-

**WOOT!**  
**Chapter done!**  
**I think I will make two more chapters, and then the bonus one. XD **  
**Why you ask? I need a chapter to put in GaGa's MONSTER song, now don't I?**  
**I know this particular chapter was rushed, but there is a reason for it. Don't think that Finn and Kurt are getting off THAT easy. **  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**Rachel-Don't Cry For Me Argentina-Evita**  
** Mercedes- You Can't Stop The Beat-Hairspray **  
**Finn and Kurt-All I Ask Of You- Phantom of the Opera **  
**Quinn-Roxie-Chicago **  
**Puck- Sandy- Grease **  
**Artie-I've Grown Accustomed To Her Face-My Fair Lady **  
**Tina-Out Tonight-RENT **  
**Santana and Brittany-For Good-WICKED**  
**Mike and Matt- We Can Do It-The Producers**


	8. Second Thoughts

**MONSTER **  
**A GLEE fanfic **  
**By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Eight: Second Thoughts **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**I am simply in love you with guys! The reviews have been awesome, and you all inspire me more to write. -laughs- I know that the other night was the season finale of GLEE and I DO NOT know what I am going to do without it!-sobs- Well, I do have Season One, Part One to watch over and relive... I think Ill be okay. So, as you can tell from the title... something is going to happen. Whether its good or not, you ll have to read on. The smut is coming soon- I promise! Or... DO I? -grins- Remember, we don t really know what will happen with Kurt and Finn in the end of GLEE all together. I can only pray and hope for the best. -sighs-**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
**NOTE- I apologize for the lateness. Work has suddenly gotten busier and I had to deal with a death in the family as well.**  
-

It was not the best of times, nor the best. As I sat on the couch in the living room, hugging a throw pillow to my chest, I watched the end of "The Princess and the Frog" with tears silently running down my cheeks. A half-eaten container of Ben and Jerry s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough on the coffee table was melting while I was surrounded by an army of tissues. Regionals had come and gone... we didn't even place, yet through some kind extension, Coach Sylvester gave us another year of Glee. Not that we weren't grateful, it just meant we had to do better next year when school would start again and we placed at Sectionals AND Regionals to keep the club going. Summer was going off to a great start.

However, that was not the whole reason why I was crying.

It was over Hudson. That's right... he was not Finn to me anymore, it was Hudson. Rachel had snuck back into his heart and the next thing I knew, I was shoved off to the side like some used pair of Manolo Blahnik heels. I couldn't quite wrap my mind around it. He sung this beautiful song with me, said he had no regrets, and once Regionals were over, he disappeared from my life and back into Rachel's. So, here I was- sobbing, eating fattening calories, watching a sappy Disney movie and mooning over the loss of my golden prize. I let the end credits roll and I slumped even further down into the couch, wiping my face. Dad was out with Carole and the Bitch-Gorilla was out with... _her_. I choked back a whimper and turned over, facing the back of the love seat, ignoring the fact that I was all alone in the house. It was only nine-thirty, but it felt like forever. I let my heart get in the way and flung myself so willingly into Hudson's arms... okay, okay, FINN! Finn's arms! The ones that should be around me right now, making out with me, and eating this damned ice cream!

Oh, God, I didn't even WANT to think about those kisses. I allowed a groan to over-come me and I shuddered at the mere memory. However, like the Fates would allow, he walked through the door. I stilled, not even turning around to face him. I hugged myself, acting like I was sleeping so he wouldn't approach me. I even let out the deep breathing, so small and sleepy-sounding. The tears that had fallen earlier were staring to irritate my skin, the salty patches drying. I could still feel him in the doorway, almost contemplating what his next move should be.

I heard his footfalls come to the couch and it dipped at the end slightly. Nothing happened until I felt the afghan fall on me, covering my body. I heard Finn sigh, his hand now brushing back my hair tenderly.

"I'm sorry, Kurt... for everything. I'll make it up to you."

I blushed at the tone of his voice as he then stood and walked out towards the spare bedroom that was now his. I allowed myself to cry yet again, the sobs wracking my body. If he was going to make it up to me, he had a long way to go.  
-

You're probably thinking of why it happened so fast and so soon after Finn pretty much confessed his feelings for me. I knew, somewhere in the back of my mind, that there would be consequences to deal with. But when we had drove home, things got sort of... frantic. Not in a busy-like way. Nor antsy. It was along the lines of lust. Pure, unadulterated lust. We both had known that for a long time that I was in love with him and when he had those days and hours to think about me and him, I knew that we wanted to possibly take it to the next level. And I was more than willing to do so. But how to go about it...? I was a complete first-timer and I was pretty sure it was for Finn. I mean, for both of us being virgins AND one of us in being straight? It probably wasn't going to end well.

Before dinner, Finn was thinking obviously of something else in mind.

I weaseled myself down to my room, feeling flustered and nervous. I knew that Finn followed shortly, his heavy footfalls sounding so ominous. I whirled around once I heard the door close softly and I backed up, watching him like a prize won. I swallowed and hugged myself, my knees knocking together and y heart flying inside of my chest. I wondered what it was that Finn seemed so... adamant about. Once he crossed the final step, his dark eyes drew me in and I whimpered slightly. "Wh-what are you doing, Finn?", I boldly asked, my voice sounding pathetic and timid like a mouse. "Don't know, really... I'm going with it", he replied in a strained tone and swooped down, capturing my lips earnestly, almost maddeningly. I moaned into the feel and twisted my hands into his thick hair, the texture soft under my fingertips. He lined his body against my own and I gasped into his mouth, the perfect opportunity for him to sneak his tongue inside, melding it with my own.

Somehow we made it to my bed, Finns hips pushing against my own, rubbing slowly as I strained against the mattress, daring to breathe. "F-Finn! Finn, Finn, Finn...," I mumbled, shaking my head to the side as I flushed under his ministrations, embarrassed and overwhelmed. "Are we g-going too fast?", I choked out, his mouth now on my neck as his hands began their wandering. "We don't have to do anything you do want to", he replied huskily against my ear, his hands now careful as they traced my sides. I wiggled at the touch and pulled his head up with my hands, staring into his earthy eyes, his own face flushed with need. "Finn, darling, I know that you really... I mean, REALLY want this, but think about it first. Perhaps we should take it slow? Experiment a little?", I implied slyly, not wanting to let him out of my sights but not also wanting to finish something I knew I couldn't. Not with my father and Carole awake, anyway. "What were you thinking of? I mean, I know I'm dude, but I don't know much about... well, you know...", he trailed off, looking down at himself and then at me, a brow raised as he looked adorably confused. I laughed some and sat up, bringing him with me. "Why, Finn Hudson, there's nothing wrong with admitting that. I know somewhat of how to do this. And the first thing I want to do... is-"

And to suggest my meaning, I placed my palm against his bulging erection trapped in his jeans.

I felt so powerful.

Finn nearly toppled forward, his face contorted sweetly in pleasurable pain. He arched his back, meeting my hand as I caressed it slowly, pressing the denim harder into his swelling member. I continued to look at him, in awe. I was making this happen to him. Not Rachel, not Quinn. ME. All me. I then took my free hand and unzipped his pants, still watching him as Finn rocked in my palm, his face flustered and breathing erratic. "Kurt...!", he keened, trying to stay quiet. "Yes?", I asked pleasantly, my voice lower than normal, taking a seductive tone. "Please?", he begged as I now fished through his boxer. I sucked in a quick lungful of air, my fingertips brushing along something hot. I blushed and touched the surface again, feeling it quiver. I grasped Finns member and brought it out, my eyes never leaving it. I was amazed, I will admit it. I only had seen my own and the ones on the Internet. I may have been in football, but I never sneaked a peak when I knew Finn was the only one I had eyes for in the showers. That, and I didn't want to take a beating from Puck and the others for looking. Finn sat still, his eyes tightly shit and biting on his bottom lip. I glanced at him for a moment and then back at his member. Grinning, I leaned down swiftly and swiped my tongue against the pulsing, angry, red-purple head. Finn jerked above me and leaned back on his elbows, his body trembling. "Tell me, Finn. What exactly do you want me to do? And be honest. I'm not turning back from this", I pointed out, grasping his cock with both hands as I massaged it, feeling the flesh pulse. I suppressed a shudder and felt my eyes flutter as Finn opened his eyes and stared at me, his piercing gaze the color of night.

He didn't have to say anything- I naturally leaned back down and took him wholly in my mouth, sucking up, my tongue flat against the surface, cradling. I sucked as best as I could, moving it around and licking the parts I couldn't fit, all the while moaning happily as I caused Finn to groan and make noises above me. I soaked in the moment as he began to ground out, "Mailman, mailman!" I was curious at that and then eyed him from under my lashes, seeing him grip the sheets, his head thrown back. I then suckled hard on the head, drawing out pre-cum all the while staring at him. Then, taking my hands, I slid the up his thing sweater-shirt. I ran my perfect manicured nails down his sturdy stomach down to the pelvic bones, making him cry out my name and arching off the bed, exploding into my mouth as I struggled to swallow his essence down. I purred at the action, so pleased with myself.

And I was shoved backwards on my bed.

I was rattled, his taste distinct in my mouth as Finn hovered over me, his form large. I shook, not sure of what to do. "Finn?", I asked quietly, sucking in my bottom lip. The next thing I knew, and I am not quite sure how it happened so fast- I was crying out his name in my pillow as he did in return what I was going to do for him. Tears smarted my eyes as he took more of me in his willing mouth, his other hand splayed over my chest while he worked my cock with his other hand, his knuckles brushing against my swollen sack. He managed to tear off all of my clothing and his own, kissing and nipping his way down to his desired point. I bit into my own knuckles, repressing a scream of pleasure as he nibbled around the slit, causing my hips to jerk and body to tense. "Finn...! Finn, Finn, please don't tease me!", I whimpered, my hands sliding down the sweaty plane of my chest to rest in his fly-away hair. He tore away from my aching need and took my hands, pulling himself up to press against my own body and placed them above my head, rocking against me. "I don't tease, Kurt... that's a territory all your own. I'm just trying to make you fly", he growled, pressing his burning cock against my own, my mewls echoing softly next to his ear as we rode wave after wave of mounted up frustration out, exploding over our stomachs. I panted heavily, my heart trying to beat right.

I felt like I was glowing.

But I never asked Finn if he was okay.  
-

The summer moved on slowly, each day hotter than the other, but the nights seemed to reach such burning heights, but only in my room. We never really did have sex. I was too scared to think about it and concerned that somewhere, in the recesses of Finns mind that he really didn't want to do this. He was often gone a lot, whereas myself would be with Mercedes, Tina and Artie, or even with Quinn. If he or I wanted to get off, we ended up searching each other out in the dark of my bedroom. I knew that I held his heart then, but... what about the other times?

I knew something was going on.

I told this to Quinn one day when we sat at Mercedes house, watching Puck clean the pool. We were lounging out in the sun, waiting for my girl to come back with some drinks. Quinn was wearing a black and white striped bikini that was very becoming on her, her hair pulled up in a messy bun and big Prada shades on her face. Puck couldn't keep his eyes off of her, winking at her often and calling her babe. I snorted at his Neanderthal mannerisms and turned back to her, the sun flashing off of my Dolce and Gabbana sunglasses. "What do you think, Quinny? You think he is regretting it?", I asked softly, toying with the end of my white button down. "It's a possibility. I mean, when I got him to make out with me a lot, he began to shy away, thinking it was wrong because of the whole celibacy thing." Quinn then let out a peal of laughter, shaking her head. "Celibacy, my ass... I had Puck pop me so I wouldn't feel fat! I didn't want Finn to do it. I felt guilty about _THAT_!", she howled. "Hey, you do know that I standing RIGHT here?", Puck announced, turning off the hose, frowning.

"And we're ignoring you", Mercedes snapped back in a friendly way, balancing four pink lemonade drinks on a tray. We gratefully took them and clinked the glasses together, taking a sip from them. We were silent for a moment when Puck cleared his throat and looked away, looking guilty. Quinn noticed this and raised a brow, settling back in her chair. "You okay?", she asked sincerely. "I... yeah. I mean, maybe."

She shrugged and looked back at me. "You need to ask him tonight if he's okay. I sure if you talk it out, you'll fix whatever is wrong. It never hurts to ask."

Mercedes sighed and tapped the rim of the cup to her lips. "But sometimes it does..."

-  
**GLEE song**  
-

Kurt in laying haphazardly across a settee, body flung back as he is dressed in ebony, sequins visible in the light that is displayed on him. He looked up, dead-paned and begins his song.

_"Silicon, _  
_saline, _  
_poison,_  
_ inject me,_  
_Baby, I'm a free bitch  
I'm a free bitch."_

He stands, fabric falling across his legs as he stands, wearing a blazer dress, Tina, Brittany and Santana crawling out of the folds with black, feathered masks and hardly anything but scraps of scarlet, silver, and black lacy fabric around their most private areas, singing backup in a synthesized tune.

_"Some girls won't dance to the beat of the track._  
_She won't walk away,_  
_But she won't look back._  
_She looks good_  
_ But her boyfriend says she's a mess,_  
_She's a mess,_  
_She's a mess,_  
_Now the girl is stressed._  
_She's a mess,_  
_She's a mess,_  
_She's a mess,_  
_She's a mess _  
_(Tell'em, girls)-"_

Kurt whirls across the marble floor, candles lighting up in old candlebras, cobwebs visible as he snaps a fan open to its fullest, strutting, eyes hooded and bright, dark makeup around them as he snarls the chorus.

_"Baby loves to dance in the dark,_  
_Cuz when he's lookin'  
She falls apart._  
_Baby loves to dance in the dark _  
_(Tell'em , girls)."_

The girls dance behind him wickedly, tantalizing as a form steps up in front of Kurt. A cape with red underlining flows behind the person, a tall man in a tuxedo with a white ceramic mask on his handsome face. Kurt leers at the man, fluttering his fan and eying him with a glint.

_"Run run,_  
_Her kiss is a vampire grin._  
_The moon lights her way while she s howlin' at him._  
_She looks good,_  
_But her boyfriend says she s a tramp._  
_She's a tramp,_  
_She's a vamp,_  
_But she still does her dance._  
_She's a tramp,_  
_She's a vamp,_  
_But she still kills the dance _  
_(Tell'em , girls)-"_

The trio of girls press against the stranger as Kurt sings, his body bending and swaying as the chorus seems to get louder from them all. The candles burn brightly, revealing a broken down ballroom with dead rose petals littering the cracked floor.

_"Baby loves to dance in the dark,_  
_Cuz when he's lookin ,_  
_She falls apart._  
_Baby loves to dance in the dark._  
_(Tell'em , girls)_  
_In the dark,_  
_She loves to dance in the dark._  
_In the dark,_  
_She loves, she loves to dance in the dark."_

Kurt breaks away from his dance, walking around the masked man, touching and caressing, the train of his glittering gown wrapping around them both. He whispers the next part into the stranger_'_s ear, closing his eyes.

_"Marilyn,_  
_Judy,_  
_Sylvia,_  
_Tell'em how you feel girls!_

_Work your blonde (Jean) Benet Ramsey,_  
_We'll haunt like Liberace._  
_Find your freedom in the music,_  
_Find your Jesus,_  
_Find your Kubrick._  
_You will never fall apart,_  
_Diana, you're still in our hearts._  
_Never let you fall apart,_  
_Together we'll dance in the dark."_

The both start to dance in a passionate, sultry waltz, being passed between the three girls as they finish the song with Kurt, who is now dancing alone, the man far away in a darkening corner of the room, being consumed by the girls. Kurt stares on, singing alone with the mask in his gloved hands.

_"Baby loves to dance in the dark,_  
_Cuz when he's lookin ,_  
_She falls apart._  
_Baby loves to dance in the dark."_

The candles extinguish, the ballroom now dark.

-  
**Kurt POV **  
-

I stood before Finn s bed, nervous. He wasn't home. It was past ten at night, and he wasn't home. I paced the room, making sure to not get my blood pressure up and take in the scenario. He might be with Matt and Mike. Or at one of his football friends house. Yeah! That might be it! I chewed on a nail, my heart racing and palms sweating. I had text him only once, not to seem a bother, but he never replied back. My gut instinct was telling me otherwise. Taking a deep breath, I then walked upstairs, got into my Ranger Rover, and drove down the neighborhood into another one.

As I drove slowly down the road, I then stopped in front of a three story house, immaculate and proper.

And I saw it.

Finn_'_s truck.

I parked along side the sidewalk and got out, my body feeling weightless and odd as I approached the happily painted, bright red door and rang the doorbell. I waited until an adult answered, asking who I was. I replied my name in a sweet manner and asked if Finn was still over here. He was needed back at home for dinner. The person nodded and asked for my dream to come down the stairs. In slow motion it seemed, I raised my eyes to meet with Finn s and my heart exploded. I knew the look on his face. His body language screamed it too.

I nodded once and then turned away, walking briskly to my baby.

I heard my nae being called, and I ignored it. I got in and buckled up, locking the doors as Finn came to my window, asking me to talk to him, please? I squared my shoulders and looked at him frostily, noting his mussed hair and red-stained lips. His eyes looked wild, as if coming down from something, his face pink. I clenched the steering wheel and narrowed my eyes at him. I rolled the window down and Finn started apologizing. I ignored him.

"Finn."

I watched him gulp, his face whitening as he stopped talking.

"Don_'_t ever... speak to me. Don_'_t acknowledge me and don_'_t... DON_'_T come near me, ever again. You and her are dead to me. You've hurt me too much, Finn. I can_'_t... I can_'_t do this."

I had knew that after Regionals, something was up, but I didn't want to acknowledge it. I ignored it and thoughtlessly flung myself at Finn when he sung with me. And behind my back, he couldn't figure out exactly what he wanted.

I rolled the window back up, backed up, and didn_'_t look back. Because it s true- I was dancing in the dark the entire time.  
-

**-stares at the screen-**  
**I totally just wrote that.**  
**Yup.**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_

**-SD**

**Dance in the Dark- Lady GaGa**


	9. Cry

**MONSTER**  
**A GLEE fanfic**  
**By: Something Dysfunctional**  
**Chapter Nine: Cry**  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**I swear... I'm alive. But barely.**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
-

The summer was crawling along at a agonizingly slow pace. I tended to hide myself out of the house and in the recesses of Mercedes' house or hanging out at the mall with the rest of my fellow gleeks. The latest I ever came home was usually around dinner time, and even then, I didn't show my face around Finn that long. I occupied in my room. Finn no longer stayed downstairs with me and was using the guest bedroom. No decorating ideas from me, no questions on what would look good with his comforter and dresser that would match. Nothing. I wanted it that way. Dad noticed my unusual behavior, but assumed that because it was summer, I wouldn't want to stay cramped up in the house all the time. He never asked me about Finn because, as usual, I performed marvelously in front of him.

Good job, Kurt. Good job.

Late at night, I could hear him talking on his phone to Rachel, or Puck. I laid there, still as can be, and ears strained to hear him talk about me from the ceiling. He never did. And then, with a heavy heart and dried eyes, I would roll over and face the wall. I cried all my tears and couldn't produce anymore. There goes my excellent gift of crying on cue... I was more than angry, pissed, and upset at him. It was a feeling of disappointment. There was nothing I could do now. I had to let it pass... somehow. One night, I laid in my bed and went over every single detail in my mind of what went wrong. Was I too brash? I don't think I pushed him into anything. He was more than willing to do what I wanted to. Did I scare him? I flushed some at the night that we passionately- yes, it was VERY passionate- made out and then he held me so close to him, breathing in the musky scent of our release and just... held me. We didn't say anything for the longest time. At the point, I was still nervous to say those three-dreaded-words to him even though they threatened to pop out of my mouth.

How could he turn away from me like that?

And go back to Rachel?

I should've been the bitch I am, find her, and cut that face up. But I mentally and physically held myself at bay and thought to be the better person in the situation. But, how long could I hold on before snapping and loosing my mind completely? I knew I was tough, and the other glee members knew too, but sometimes, maybe... possibly...

it was better to let it loose and win back what rightfully belonged to me.  
-

I never told Quinn about what happened between Finn and I. I didn't want to tell her nor Mercedes. So, instead, I approached Tina. She had exactly what I needed for part one of my plan I was concocting up. And later on, I went to Santana and Brittany about my plan. As Cheerios, we held the keys to the school and to the student body. Plus, they both knew how to get guys to fall head-over-heels for the without really trying. With twinkling dark eyes, Santana sat me on her bed and leaned forward one afternoon, grinning maliciously it seemed. "So, Finn thought it would be funny to go from you to Rachel, huh?", she sneered prettily, flipping back her black hair. I nodded stiffly and stared at my hands. "I knew it wouldn't happen anyway", I mumbled darkly. Santana snorted and glared at me. "You are worth twelve of that big-nosed wannabe."

"That's a lot of Kurts. Wouldn't there be, like... a riot or something? That's too any fashinistas going after Finn", Brittany said thoughtfully, cleaning her nails, looking seriously at me. Be glad you are cute, Santana uttered under her breath. Brittany smiled and giggled to herself at the comment and I looked on with a bemused smile on my face. "This is what you are going to do, Kurt, and you may not like it... but it's got to be done", the Latina told me pointedly, looking determined. I nodded, swallowing. "I can't believe I stooping down to this level, but, I'll do anything", I said detachedly. "It's going to take the rest of summer, a lot of trips to the mall and gym, and with Tina's sense of dark clothes, trust me- no will will resist you. You'll even get the straight boys panting after you."

"Are girls dogs? They kind of scare me. They drool a lot too", Brittany said thoughtfully.  
-

At the end of July, the glee club was invited to the new karaoke club in town from Mr. Schuester. Eager and excited, they dressed to the nines and walked in like the place was made for them. As for me, I waited until I received the text from Santana at my house. Tina was placing the final touches on me. Scrutinizing under bright yellow eyeshadow, she brushed back my hair and smiled some, though it looked sad.

"Kurt, are you sure you want to do this?", she asked softly, her almond-shaped eyes steady on me. I nodded at her, my heart fluttering. "There's always a reason for something. If you really want it, I got to go get it", I sniffed, turning away to look at the floor-length mirror, staring at the person who stared back with hollow sea-green eyes and a outfit that would make Davey Havok cry.

We made it there when everyone inside had gotten good and comfortable. I walked in the dim house, not looking for the group as I slid against the back walls. I saw the lumbering form of Finn sitting with Rachel, acting cool and as if they weren't going out at all. I thought bitterly and angrily that it was a possibly that they were holding hands under the table. I scowled and made my way to the song book, flipping through the laminated pages for a specific song that I knew would have the whole group think differently of me. I found the song I wanted and requested it. I sat in the corner, hands on the table top as I saw my cell go off with a text. I opened it, seeing the message from Quinn.

**'Where are u? you should be here with us!'**

_'Oh, I don't know if I up for tonight. Haven't been feeling too well.'_

**'ok. let me know something. hope you feel better.'**

I smiled grimly and closed my phone, leaning back. I closed my eyes and let my head clear, readying myself. I let the noise wash over me until silence rang in my mind. I focused on Finn and wondered if he would have any idea what was coming... I allowed my vision to open and fall on him, chatting away and laughing with the other members. And then, unlike anything Ive ever felt, my heart died and a emptiness swept over me. I hardened at the emotion and felt everything that I've ever held in brimming to the surface, boiling over. I heard Artie finish his song and everyone applaud him as he wheeled off the small stage. Everyone settled in, waiting for the next person. Rachel beamed, thinking it was her as she pushed back her hair, priming herself.

"The next singer tonight will be... Kurt Hummel!"

I stood and walked briskly to the stage, slowing my anger into a sway, allowing my hips to naturally fall into a rhythm. I lowered my eyes, smiling secretly like I knew something and my body moved on its own as I took the microphone. I heard the Glee club whispering loudly to each other and the gasps that erupted when they saw what I wore. My hair was pushed back messily, the form-fitting black leather pants hugging me tightly along with the midnight, sequined v-neck long-sleeved shirt that showed off my long neck and some of my chest. Tina did my eyes in a smoky black that was still easy on the eyes but screamed "I am sexy pussy-cat." Black platform shoes completed the look, including the faint dusting of glitter powder that reflected off of my milky-white skin. Faintly, I could hear Puck's voice saying, "Shit!", and I soaked up the spotlight, raising a brow. "Tonight, I will be singing... a song. I'm not saying what. I like to keep people on their toes", I practically purred, hearing the echo of feedback around me.

I inhaled quietly, and began:

_"I love the way your heart breaks,_  
_With every injustice and deadly fate._  
_Praying it all be new,_  
_And living like it all depends on you."_

_"Here you are down on your knees again._  
_Trying to find air to breathe again._  
_Only surrender will help you now,_  
_I love you please see and believe again."_

_"I love that you're never satisfied._  
_With face value wisdom and happy lies._  
_You take what they say and go back and cry,_  
_You're so close to me that you nearly died!"_

_"Here you are down on your knees again._  
_Trying to find air to breathe again._  
_Only surrender will help you now._  
_I love you please see and believe again."_

_"They don't have to understand you,_  
_Be still._  
_Wait and know I understand you,_  
_Be still._  
_Be still!"_

_"Here you are down on your knees again._  
_Trying to find air to breathe again._  
_Only surrender will help you now._  
_The floodgates are breaking  
And pouring out!"_

_"Here you are down on your knees._  
_Trying to find air to breathe._  
_Right where I want you to be again,_  
_I love you please see and believe again"_

_"Here you are down on your knees again._  
_Trying to find air to breathe again._  
_Right where I want you to be again-_  
_See and believe...!"_

The last note I sang hovered in the air like a knife until the audience roared with applause and whistles. I drew back into my hole as I gave the mic up and walked towards the exit, ignoring the pleads and calls of my fellow glee club members. I saw Santana wink at me and Tina stare on, sympathy hovering over her face. I knew what I did and what I had sung. I opened the doors and allowed the cool summer air to hit my face. I didn't feel a thing.  
-

Later on, as I did my nighttime facial regiment, I knew that Finn would be in soon. I tried to not act nervous and settle how fast my heart kept beating at the thought of him possibly coming down here and asking what the hell was wrong with me tonight. I swiped back the rest of my moisturizer until I heard the front door close and the quiet talking between my father and Finn. My hands stilled and I waited with bated breath. Blood pounded in my ears as I heard the heavy footsteps above me in the kitchen. Then, they traveled near my door. I bit down hard on my bottom lip, trying to not break the skin. They stilled, as if trying to figure out where to go. Instead, they walked on. I let out a shaky breath, stood, turned off my light to let the others upstairs know I was now in bed, and sat in the dark. Slowly, I walked to my bed and slid in the safety of the sheets, pulling the over my head like a little kid. It was over- it had to be. Finn made his choice and now, he could lie with it. I knew that no one could replace the void that was inside. No one like him.

Melodramatic of me, I know.

I laid there, trying to allow sleep to take over. Within thirty minutes and of Dad going to sleep with Carole, I then heard a door open. My eyes flew open at the sound and the padded footsteps walking around, quiet and soft. I strained to hear them and then, I felt the air shift down in the basement.

My door opened.

I shut my eyes quickly as I felt a presence come near me. I allow my breathing to come out even and labored, as if I had already fallen asleep. This was twice Finn caught me playing possum and I wondered faintly if it would work again.

"I know you're awake."

_... damn._

"What do you want, Finn?", I asked in a clipped, whispered tone. "What was up with tonight? Acting all like that? It didn't seem like you", Finn replied, equally quiet. "Well, I'm sorry. I can't please everyone. Things have been... difficult for me. I needed to let some steam out by singing. Nothing wrong with that", I answered defensively. "I didn't like it. It sounded like you were mad. And what was with the get-up? You looked like that Adam Lambert person", he bit back, a angry tone in his voice. I grounded my teeth and sat up, trying to find him in the darkness of my room. "Listen here, Finn Hudson, what I do and wear doesn't concern you. It shouldn't anymore. Now that Rachel is clinging to your side now like some badly dressed leech, there's no reason to act so high-and-mighty with me. Now, please go to bed!"

"This has to do with her, doesn't it?"

I snorted, rolling my eyes. "It took you that long to figure it out?", I scoffed, hugging myself. I was getting pissed and I didn't want to get Dad down here, but Finn was pressing my buttons. Hard. Silence was met and then, he leaned towards me, a hand grasping my arm tightly like a steal vice. I gasped and pulled back. "Let go of me!", I hissed, fear creeping in my chest. "You're jealous...? Is that what it takes to get you worked up? Kurt... please? Listen to me?", he pleaded, using his free hand to cup my face. I jerked away, the touch electrifying. Oh, no, he still had that effect on me! "It's not jealousy, Finn. It's the fact you don't know who you want! Or who you can't have! It's not a three-way street, it's either one or the other!," I snapped back icily. Finn made a noise and pressed his face against the top of my head suddenly, pulling me practically into his lap. "This isn't easy on me either! First you swoop in and catch me off guard and then I broke during Regionals with Rachel standing there... it was a mistake and I'm paying for it, but dammit, I don't like people looking at you the way they did tonight!", he groaned in my hair, his arms tightening around me.

I sat there, unmoving.

"What are you saying?", I asked in a timid voice, shaking.

"I'm saying that I miss you, Kurt. I-I don't want to loose you like this. It's hurting me."

I sat there in the darkness, in Finn's lap as I then felt him move above me, his large and achingly familiar hands sought my face, turning it up. I allowed his mouth to seek my own, pressing lips against my temples, cheeks, chin, the jawline...

My composure crumbled and I turned my head, claiming his mouth fully.

I died once more.  
-

**...**  
**cliff-hanger.**  
**Fwahahaha.**  
**I swear, I am not a mean person! I just dont have ENOUGH time on my hands.**  
**Ugh.**  
**I will be gone for a week in North Carolina with NO INTERNET because I is going to do some missionary work but I will be writing on paper the next chapter. And its gonna be gggeeewwwdddd.**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**Again- Flyleaf**


	10. Giving Out

**MONSTER **  
**A GLEE fanfic **  
**By: Something Dysfunctional **  
**Chapter Ten: Giving Out **  
**Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns the show and my soul. Damn you.**  
**ZOMFG... I am writing a chapter. To a much left-behind story that I didn't forget. I HAZ NEW LAPTOP! Which means that all my keys work. Fwahaha. I apologize to the long and over-due delay to you guys, ye old faithful readers. The last chapter had many wondering why Kurt and Finn kissed because of the hurtful way that Finn and Rachel got back at the end of Regionals. Well, since the new season started with Blaine involved, I'm still going to write on during the season, which means that this will become one of my many long chapter stories on here. -snerks- And I do believe I owe all of you... a smutty scene.**  
**Let's Get Physical!**  
**P.S.- I DON'T LIKE THE IDEA OF KURT AND BLAINE... no matter HOW cute Blaine is. -pouts- In my mind, it will be Finn. Grah.**  
-

I did it.

One taste, and I was done. I could feel Finn's hands all over me at once and I felt as thought I had drowned in fire. He kept pulling me down and I simply complied. I didn't want the feeling to go away...

Finn pushed me back on my back, hands thrust up my night shirt as I frantically raked my hands through his impossibly soft hair, pulling him in with me. Our mouths bruised against one another as each tongue swiped, danced, and savored the feelings and tastes that we each had to offer. I moaned erratically as he slowly brushed his hips against my own. I was literally burning up because of Finn. Everything that we had been feeling up until that point was pushed into that kiss and I welcomed it greedily. Every thought of Rachel was tossed to the side, every hurt feeling I had from Finn and her I doubled it. I wanted Finn to think of no one but ME and solely ME. I ground my hips against his own, rolling slowly to receive the friction I was craving. Finn moaned appreciatively and pulled away, kissing down my jaw and down to my neck, his breath hot and his large hands ripping away my Lady Gaga t-shirt. I honestly didn't care-

I was _feeling_ him.

"Finn, Finn, Finn...," I mumbled wantonly, arching to his touches. "I'm here, Kurt. I'm here," he answered huskily, pulling away. His eyes were dark with lust and another emotion I couldn't place. He looked down at my shirt in his hand and then his puppy-dog eyes glanced at me. "Uuuhmmm... I'm sorry. I know how much you liked that shirt," he muttered apologetically. I shook my head, leaning up on my elbows. "Not a problem- I can always ask Dad to give me another one," I answered, reaching out and tugging at his shirt. "What? Want it off?," Finn asked suggestively, raising a brow. I nodded frantically and with a grin, he whipped it off and I nearly squealed like one of the Cheerios. He was no Puck, nor one of the beach boys I normally used to fantasize about, but in my eyes, Finn was "perfect" in everyway. He obviously had muscles to the nines and such... _strong_ shoulders...

"Am I drooling yet?," I asked numbly, gazing down towards his stomach and to the... lovely present that was straining to release from his jeans. Finn laughed some and gave me that dopey half-smile of his and leaned down, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "No, not yet. Kurt...," he murmured, his mouth ghosting over my swollen lips. I trembled at the intense emotion that raced through me and I looked up at him, eyes hooded, gazing into his dark depths and I allowed my soul to be sucked in.

And then, I remembered it all- the hurt, the pain, the agony of being turned away:

**_Quinn's face when she stared back and forth from him to Puck, always crying for not being smart but knowing Finn would go to her with a flutter of her eyelashes. Santana's smirk when she took his most valuable asset from him and with a flick of her Cheerio skirt, his eyes would follow. And then, Rachel's wide, doe-eyed expressions of love and loyalty, practically begging him to have her even if he thought her annoying until her hand would touch his chest, Finn would tag behind, helpless and wanting more from her._**

It was like a burning blade sliced through my stomach and, with sudden strength, I pushed him away with my hands with a sudden cry. Finn stumbled backwards on the bed, confused and hurt-looking. "What... the hell, Kurt?," he exclaimed. I paused, feeling my body hum with adrenaline and tears smarted my eyes. Then, I stood abruptly, searching for my shirt. "No, Finn, not like this. I can't do it like this!," I cried out, bitterly. Finn stared on with a blank expression on his face and like moving underwater, he stood slowly, unsure. "Not like what?" I glared at him, sniffling some and stuffing my head through the hole of the shirt. "This... THIS! The making out, the playing "I'm hurting, let me lay it all on you" drama BULLSHIT!," I screeched, throwing my hands to the sides. "I'm not a rebound and I don't want to for Rachel Berry for THAT matter! If you're horny and want something, either go to her, or ring up Santana because I will never be sloppy thirds!," I yelled, snatching up a pea coat from my chair. "Kurt, I never thought of you like that!," Finn argued back, snapping.

Scowling, I turned from him and up the stairs, putting on my jacket at the same time. "Well, at least this time I know what not to fall for again," I threw back at him, the tears now flowing freely down my face as I saw his expression fall, his mouth opening some and eyes flashing with guilt.

Soon, I was outside in the night air and it was rather humid, rain falling. I groaned some but ignored it, knowing my hair was going to fall flat but I walked on along the sidewalk, hugging myself. The more I walked, I got somewhat cooler, teeth chattering and my hurt flaming brightly. I stopped, the lights of passing cars flowing past me. I swallowed the lump that formed in my throat, trying to push it back and the tears to stop mingling with the rain that now poured constantly.

Every time...

knocked down.

_'Keep walking, keep walking, keep walking,'_ I told myself and I willed my legs to move despite the pajama legs clinging to my legs. And, out of no where, it seemed that a stand of music skipped across my mind. I looked around at where I was an noticed it was the bus stop. I sat down inside the cubicle and hunched over, trying to warm up and get dry. And then, the song came back along with a dream-like music video...  
-

Alone on a deserted, city street, fog rolls in low. Silence. A few dead leave scatter across the pavement and soon, the blurred image of Kurt comes in with a solemn face. His clothes are gray tones, black, tattered. His hair is not slicked back but tousled. He opens his mouth, a sorrowful tune escapes:

_"I know I can't take one more step towards you,_  
_Cause all that's waiting is regret,_  
_And don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore?_  
_You lost the love I loved the most."_

_I learned to live half alive,_  
_And now you want me one more time."_

He stops in front of several broken down cars, head bent as the wind shifts the fog around his booted feet. In one of the cars, Finn is in the driver's seat, mouth barely covering Quinn's as if he was drawing something out from her...

_"And who do you think you are,_  
_Running 'round leaving scars?_  
_Collecting your jar of hearts,_  
_And tearing love apart._  
_You're gonna catch a cold,_  
_From the ice inside your soul._  
_So don't come back for me-_  
_Who do you think you are?"_

Kurt walks by slowly as Quinn pushes Finn away suddenly, outraged and pale as he stares ahead, unblinking and glowing, holding Quinn's heart as she leaves the car, slamming the door.

_"I hear you're asking all around,_  
_If I am anywhere to be found._  
_But I have grown too strong  
To ever fall back in your arms._

_And learn to live half alive _  
_And now you want me one more time."_

He passes a phone booth where Finn is there again, holding his face near Santana's as she claws the windows, body jerking and Kurt barely gives them a glance as more dead leaves rain down. She then flees, crying as he holds her heart.

_"And who do you think you are _  
_Running 'round leaving scars?_  
_Collecting your jar of hearts,_  
_And tearing love apart._  
_You're gonna catch a cold,_  
_From the ice inside your soul._  
_So don't come back for me-_  
_Who do you think you are?"_

Rain starts to dance the leaves as Kurt stands on his own, seeing Finn under an umbrella with Rachel, holding her close as she presses her lips oh-so-near his own, as if she was struggling to breathe. With a twist, she whirls away, vague and Finn looks forward, her heart now his.

_"Dear, it took so long just to feel alright._  
_Remember how to put back the light in my eyes._  
_I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed,_  
_Cause you broke all your promises._  
_And now you're back,_  
_You don't get to get me back!"_

The street now opens up with the rain and fog, silent dancers moving behind Kurt in tattered dresses and matted hair. Tina, Brittnay, Santana, Quinn, and Rachel look like beggars, trying to find something as they file behind Kurt who is mournfully looking at Finn, who stares at him with empty eyes.

_"And who do you think you are,_  
_Running 'round leaving scars?_  
_Collecting your jar of hearts,_  
_And tearing love apart._  
_You're gonna catch a cold,_  
_From the ice inside your soul._  
_So don't come back for me-_  
_Don't come back at all."_

Each girl that was taken fights Finn in a dance struggle, trying to win back what they wanted. Each prevails, taking back a piece of what they lost, angry and fierce expressions on their dirty faces.

_"And who do you think you are,_  
_Running 'round leaving scars?_  
_Collecting your jar of hearts,_  
_And tearing love apart._  
_You're gonna catch a cold,_  
_From the ice inside your soul._  
_Don't come back for me-_  
_Don't come back at all!"_

The pale boy approaches Finn, glaring hatefully, eyes burning like the ocean as he shakes his head at the taller teen, hands grabbing fistfuls of his leather jacket. Finn continues to look down at him, unsure and hurting himself.

_"Who do you think you are?"_

Kurt moves his head in close...

_"Who do you think you are?"_

Both closes their eyes- Finn expecting his final kiss...

_"Who do you think... you are?"_

Kurt inhales deeply and shuddering, Finna collapses on the dirty ground as the bleak city glows in golden sunlight. The leaves have turned into pink petals and Kurt rolls his head back, holding his own heart back as Finn lays at his feet. He draws in a breath, steps over the body and walks off, head hanging.  
-

Opening my eyes blearily, I knew that it was officially done.  
-

Another year went into McKinley High school. Vocal Adrenaline had won Regionals, but we were able to fight for another year to stay. Quinn and Puck's baby, Beth, went to Rachel's biological mother. Artie was seeing Brittnay and Tina was with Mike in a twist of odd fate. Quinn instead was dating the new member of the Glee club, Sam, who reminded me of a blonde version of Justin Beiber. Mercedes was finding her true diva and voice while Rachel was beginning to take it down a notch. Puck, for some odd reason, was falling for Lauren Zizes, who was my replacement. Santana, of course, was NOT thrilled. And, by this time, Finn was with Rachel. I, however, relocated to another school- Dalton for their zero-tolerance bully policy. Karovsky had gotten to me to where I was scared to walk the halls. After Finn's mother and my father's wedding, I was placed at the school much to everyone's shock.

I didn't ask Finn how he felt. I never asked for his opinion. In my case, I thought it best to leave it alone with Finn. Besides, my attention was now around Blaine Anderson (who is REALLY hot and sincere and sweet...), one of the Warblers at Dalton that went against New Directions at Sectionals. I know, I know... myself going against my fellow Glee members. But it was fun, but I knew there was something missing. That feeling of being together and having fun...

Home was okay with Dad and Carole. I was very polite towards Finn, but only that. Since that night, months and months ago, I dare not be with him in the same room if we were alone. Perhaps Berry finally cooled off his raging hormones.

But that wasn't the case when Rachel came to my house when Finn was at football practice and I was home from Dalton. I raised an eyebrow at her standing in my doorway, wearing a horrible dark navy sweater with a butter-yellow braiding on the collar and dark green diamond patterns on the ugly thing, a red pleated skirt and these... LOAFERS with knee-high socks in that same yellow... her hair was mussed and eyes watery, as if she had been crying. "Uhm... I didn't do it whatever it was," I said, holding up my hands. "Oh, don't give me that! You ought to know I would have never come over here unless it was something really, really, REALLY important!," she wailed, stomping in. I blinked, looking at the empty space in front of me. "Okay... sure, you can come in," I muttered, closing the door. "There's something wrong with Finn! He won't tell me anything- his singing is off, he looks like a zombie and I can't even GET him to talk to me!"

"Well, you DID make out with Puck..."

She drew in her bottom lip, eyes over-flowing. "B-but I TRIED to get him to forgive m-m-meee!"

I rolled my eyes. "You broke his heart. He's GOING to act like that," I said rather snottily, crossing my arms over my chest. Rachel flew at me, hair flying back like a wave of brown ribbons. She grasped my shoulders, searching my face. "You've GOT to get him to come back to me!," she pleaded. My blood ran cold and I swear my feet went numb. I started, then shut my mouth, not knowing what to say. "Rachel... that's... not my area of expertise...," I trailed off. "But you live with him! Try and get him to tell you what he's feeling, for me, please?," she cried hysterically, sobbing now in my chest. I stood there, not knowing what to do. I raised my eyes to the ceiling of my living room, allowing the girl to cry.

I hope she could cry for two.  
-

**-grins-**  
**Hi guys.**  
**And yes, the "music video" was inspired by the same of Christina Perri's.**  
**-the moonlight carries the message of Love.-**

_**Later Days...!**_  
**-SD**

**"Jar of Hearts" by Christina Perri**


	11. Author Note

Just an author note:  
I am apologizing for the lateness of this story. My lack of watching "GLEE" was due to the fact of family issues and work as well.  
However, when I get a review (which I deleted because it was HIGHLY offensive to me) that says that my version of Kurt is... unlikeable... I take it the hard way because of several reasons:

One- **PUT YOURSELF IN HIS SHOES.**  
Two- some homosexuals have tenancies to be hurt very easily if someone strays away that they love deeply and in this case, Finn.  
Three- in the second season of GLEE, it does appear that Kurt is acting rather cold towards Finn since the Theatrically episode.  
Four- Kurt now, in the show, is leaning towards Blaine.

MY VERSION of how I THINK it should be (opinion and freedom to write) is how Kurt FEELS.

Uhm... "HELLO" gays certainly do have feelings and I think, by expressing how he does... he's GOING to be moody, sour, crass, and very bitter.

A thing like love can't be taken lightly and in this case...  
IT'S ONLY FAN FICTION.

But still... if ya don't like my story, then **DON'T READ IT. DON'T EVEN REVIEW IT.**  
... I think I'm done now.

I WILL finish MONSTER soon, guys, I PROMISE.


End file.
